stroke his own rigid shaft. He does so with expert ease, making it obvious that this is something he’s used to doing.
And I’m captivated.
I’m insanely aroused.
I’m pretty sure I’m going to be replaying this scene in my head again and again for decades to come.
“Show me how,” I beg and he groans when my hand wraps around him. He lets me do the work, guiding my hand up and down, and I love it. I love the hot feel of his skin and knowing that I get him so hard. I love it when he reaches around my back to undo my bra and then groans when he succeeds. I love it when he loses control and seizes me tightly, kissing me with sudden ferocity. I love the heat of his mouth and the way he trembles the instant he lets go and spills into my hand.
“Holy shit, honey,” he pants, still holding me close.
I wish he’d kiss me again but seconds later he seems almost embarrassed. He grabs a nearby roll of paper towels from a shelf, carefully wipes off my hand and then tactfully mops himself off before zipping up.
Now that we’re done I’m not sure what to say. A long moment of silence stretches out with Ben buckling his pants and me fastening my bra and zipping my dress. His sweatshirt is still folded up on the bench so I hand it over to him. He gives me a wry grin and pulls it over his head.
“It’s not true,” he says.
I miss the sight of his bare chest already. “What’s not true?”
He looks at me for a long time before answering. “Those stories about me hooking up with half the town. Sure, I have fun now and then but as for the mass orgies and the shades of lipstick on my dick, I don’t do that kind of shit. That’s not what I’m like.”
I can feel a smile trying to break through on my face. “I’m glad.”
“Hey.” He nudges my knee. “How are you getting home?”
“I was going to call my dad for a ride.”
“Could I walk with you instead?” He makes a face. “Sorry, I know it’s bitter outside. I’d drive you if I had a car.”
This time I don’t try to hide my smile. “I’d like to walk home with you. I don’t mind the cold.”
Ben checks all the locks and shuts off the rest of the lights before we leave through the main door. I’m mildly horrified when he sheepishly explains that he has no jacket because he left it behind at school and he doesn’t have another.
“You must be freezing,” I say, bundled up in my own down jacket.
He shrugs. “Nah.”
But when I take his arm in the hopes of transferring a little bit of warmth he doesn’t pull away. The walk to my house is not far but we take our time. We talk about Devil Valley. We talk about Black Mountain. Ben has a really wicked sense of humor and he skillfully mimics some of our more obnoxious classmates until I’m giggling uncontrollably. I don’t know why I never realized how funny he is.
We’re passing the bus stop when I confess to him that sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be one of the rich Black Mountain kids we go to school with. I bet life would be easier. It has to be.
Ben is real quiet after I say this. He tips his head back and stares up at the clear winter sky.
“Money doesn’t always make life easy,” he says and he sounds sad. He sounds like he knows what he’s talking about. “Sometimes it does the opposite.”
We walk in silence for an entire block but it’s not an uneasy silence. Cardinal Street is decked out with holiday lights and right now in the darkness it looks pretty.
“Do you have big plans for the holidays?” I ask him.
“Not really. Gonna work. Gonna sleep in. Gonna enjoy not taking the bus back and forth for a few weeks.”
“You won’t be visiting family or anything?”
“Nope.”
“We’ll drive out to Pennington to see my grandmother on Christmas day. She lives with her two younger sisters. That’s about the only family we have left.”
I wait for Ben to offer some information. He doesn’t.
I squeeze his arm. “Is it weird to say that there are so many things I want to know about you?”
He sighs. “No. But there are things I can’t tell you.”
“Ben.”
His voice sharpens. “You just need to trust me, Camden.”
“But-“
My words