I nod, gripping my mother’s locket a little tighter. I felt so raw, so emotional.
“You were her greatest accomplishment.”
It was then that I broke. Leaning forward, I placed my face against the mattress and I let years of feelings go. All the times my father made me feel less than worthy, all the years I longed for my mother but couldn’t even ask him about her. I cried too because now, I could finally place all of that behind me.
***
The rain was falling heavily, and I sat outside the fraternity looking through the windshield of Vera’s Camry. I’d lost track of just how long I had sat there watching the rain pelt the glass. The sun had set, more lights came on inside the house, yet still I remained inside the car.
My phone rang loudly, filling the silence and my body jerked in surprise.
Jay’s picture lit up the screen and I smiled wide, feeling my entire body warm.
I lifted the phone, tapped the button, and then the speaker. “What are you doing?” I knew then that he must’ve seen me outside and when I looked toward the front porch there he stood.
“Stay there.” I didn’t wait for him to respond, I end the call and open the door, stepping out into the rain. Tucking my phone and keys into the pocket of my jeans, I began to walk across the lawn toward him and he remained where he was just like I’d told him. When I stopped at the bottom of the steps he tilted his head just slightly as if silently asking if I was okay.
The rain felt amazing and I remembered a time when my father was out of town and my mom and I played in the rain for hours. It was one of the best times I’d shared with her. She was so happy.
“Get out of the rain, you goof.” The way he was smiling at me, like even though I was crazy he found it adorable, made me feel completely safe.
I climbed the stairs and stopped in front of him, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him closer. My hips covered his and he accepted my kiss, placing his hands on the small of my back. He didn’t let the fact that I was soaked stop him from holding me close.
Pulling back, I made sure his eyes were open and he was looking at me when I said the words I needed to say. “I love you.” Tears clouded my vision once more. “Thank you for being so unbelievably sweet and good to me.”
“I love you too.” His thumb glided along my jaw and brushed over the edge of my lower lip. “And please don’t thank me for being sweet to you, baby, you deserve someone who is good to you. That should never be a rarity.”
“I don’t want to know how you got my mother’s things, I just want you to know that you’ve given me back a part of my mother I’d thought I’d lost and that alone I can never thank you enough for.”
He started to say something, but I kissed him once more to make the words stop. Thanking him was still not enough, but right now it was all I had. Jay had become my rock, though in the beginning I thought he was bad for me. I allowed my father and even a scorned friend to lead me to believe that guys like Jay were nothing good. But I couldn’t have been more wrong. Jay was, is, and always would be my saving grace.
Pulling back from our kiss once more, I looked up at him and smiled. Taking Jay by the hand, I gave a little tug. At first he resisted, pulling me tighter against him, but I refused to give up. I needed this moment. Again I gripped his hand and began walking backward down the stairs, refusing to let him hide under the awning of the porch. Finally he stopped resisting and joined me, stepping out into the rain.
Once we were both fully exposed to the rainfall I released his hand and held my own out to my sides, spinning in a circle with my head tilted back and the rain hitting my face. I laughed, not caring that I looked like a fool. Reaching up high, I twirled and twirled and then stopped, facing him once more. My hair was plastered to my face, I was more than sure my makeup was smeared, the