worry in my head, imagined slapping him. I ignored her.
"Could happen to anybody," Ian said, planting a light punch on Jamie's arm.
"Right," Jamie muttered.
"Where's everybody?"
I watched Trudy from the corner of my eye as she answered him.
"They, uh, had some unloading to finish up." This time her eyes moved toward the southern tunnel very deliberately, and Ian's expression hardened, turned enraged for half a second. Then Trudy glanced back at me and caught me watching.
Distract them, Melanie whispered.
I looked down at Jamie quickly.
"Are you hungry?" I asked him.
"Yeah."
"When aren't you hungry?" Ian teased. His face was relaxed again. He was better at deception than Trudy.
When we reached our room, Jamie sank gratefully onto the big mattress.
"You sure you're okay?" I checked.
"It's nothing. Really. Doc says I'll be fine in a few days."
I nodded, though I was not convinced.
"I'm going to go clean up," Trudy murmured as she left.
Ian propped himself against the wall, going nowhere.
Keep your face down when you lie, Melanie suggested.
"Ian?" I stared intently at Jamie's bloody leg. "Do you mind getting us some food? I'm hungry, too."
"Yeah. Get us something good."
I could feel Ian's eyes on me, but I didn't look up.
"Okay," he agreed. "I'll be back in just a second." He emphasized the short time.
I kept my gaze down, as if I were examining the wound, until I heard his footsteps fade.
"You aren't mad at me?" Jamie asked.
"Of course not."
"I know you didn't want me to go."
"You're safe now; that's all that matters." I patted his arm absentmindedly. Then I got to my feet and let my hair, now chin length, fall forward to hide my face.
"I'll be right back-I forgot something I wanted to tell Ian."
"What?" he asked, confused by my tone.
"You'll be okay here by yourself?"
"Course I will," he retorted, sidetracked.
I ducked out around the screen before he could ask anything else.
The hall was clear, Ian out of sight. I had to hurry. I knew he was already suspicious. He'd noticed that I'd noticed Trudy's awkward and artificial explanation. He wouldn't be gone long.
I walked quickly, but didn't run, as I moved through the big plaza. Purposeful, as if I were on an errand. There were only a few people there-Reid, headed for the passageway that led to the bathing pool; Ruth Ann and Heidi, paused by the eastern corridor, chatting; Lily and Wes, their backs to me, holding hands. No one paid me any attention. I stared ahead as if I were not focused on the southern tunnel, only turning in at the very last second.
As soon as I was in the pitch-black of the corridor, I sped up, jogging along the familiar path.
Some instinct told me this was the same thing-that this was a repeat of the last time Jared and the others had come home from a raid, and everyone was sad, and Doc had gotten drunk, and no one would answer my questions. It was happening again, whatever I wasn't supposed to know about. What I didn't want to know about, according to Ian. I felt prickles on the back of my neck. Maybe I didn't want to know.
Yes, you do. We both do.
I'm frightened.
Me, too.
I ran as quietly as I could down the dark tunnel.
Chapter 40: Horrified
I slowed when I heard the sound of voices. I was not close enough to the hospital for it to be Doc. Others were on their way back. I pressed myself against the rock wall and crept forward as quietly as I could. My breathing was ragged from running. I covered my mouth with my hand to stifle the sound.
"... why we keep doing this," someone complained.
I wasn't sure whose voice it was. Someone I didn't know well. Maybe Violetta? It held that same depressed tone that I recognized from before. It erased any notion that I'd been imagining things.
"Doc didn't want to. It was Jared's idea this time."
I was sure that it was Geoffrey who spoke now, though his voice was a little changed by the subdued revulsion in it. Geoffrey had been with Trudy on the raid, of course. They did everything together.
"I thought he was the biggest opponent to this business."
That was Travis, I guessed.
"He's more... motivated now," Geoffrey answered. His voice was quiet, but I could tell he was angry about something.
They passed just half a foot from where I cringed into the rocks. I froze, holding my breath.
"I think it's sick," Violetta muttered. "Disgusting. It's never going to work."
They walked slowly, their steps weighted with despair.
No one