texture is horrendous.
“Christmas is trash,” he growls as the throws the chestnut bag into the bin. “Trash snacks, tacky décor. I’m taking it over for the good of your people.”
Alejandro is grinning openly. He lifts Avery’s hand up and kisses his knuckles, and every ounce of his irritation melts at the tender touch. “Let’s get lunch.”
It’s possibly the most romantic thing he’s ever experienced in his life, and although he knows he’s baiting the universe, he lets himself think that it can’t get better than this.
16
Tumbling Down
Dinner’s ready by the time they get home. It’s less of a Chanukah affair and more of a simple, roasted chicken and vegetables, but there’s another fresh loaf of challah on the table, and Avery thinks the dessert in the kitchen is probably more sufganiyot—which he never gets tired of.
Alejandro kisses him just inside the door, dropping the bags of gifts for his parents that they picked up at the market, and he kicks them aside to have better access to all of Avery. And God, he could get used to this. He could absolutely get used to this.
He wants longer days with more kisses that don’t lead anywhere. He wants this feeling of being settled all the time—like he’s not sitting on the edge of a cliff and waiting to be pushed over. He knows people have that kind of security in their relationships. He believed in it once, well before he met Alejandro. And it’s funny how that one, single year fucked it all up so badly.
But he’s willing to forgive, even if forgetting is harder.
He lets Alejandro kiss him a bit longer, then they take off their shoes and meet in the living room and he lights the candles. He runs through the blessing a bit faster than before. The second night always loses a little bit of the magic, even as the chanukiah burns twice as bright as the night before. He does take a moment to watch the reflection in the glass, though, and he misses his mom and dad.
He wishes he’d found a dreidel and some gelt while they were out, just because he thinks it would be fun to watch Alejandro lose. And maybe he’d feed Avery the chocolate after. The coins are always cheap chocolate, but they do go down nicely with wine—and he thinks they’d be even better with the press of Alejandro’s warm tongue in his mouth to follow every bite.
Still, the evening is nice without it. It feels wintery and soft, and his shoulders aren’t as tense as they had been the night before. They eat in the dining room with the lights dimmed, and through the doorway, he can see the way the candles are still flickering. They have no obligations. They don’t have to be anywhere or do anything. They just exist, and he loves that.
He’s right about the sufganiyot, and most of them are jam, but he sees a couple that have a sort of custard in them, and he doesn’t mind breaking with tradition. He takes a bite then offers some to Alejandro who waves him off with an apologetic smile.
“I have a…thing,” he says, and Avery likes that he doesn’t entirely shy away from his quirks, “with icing sugar. I don’t really know how to explain it. It just feels wrong.” He drums in his fingers on the table, and the sound is starting to make Avery smile every time he hears it.
“Is it always food?” Avery asks. He leans his elbow on the table and feels kind of wild that he can just ask and know he won’t be ignored or shut out.
Alejandro bites his lip, and he unconsciously fiddles with his ear. His nostrils twitch a bit—another thing that Avery noticed, and he’s not even sure Alejandro is aware he does it. “Not always. But my issues—my compulsions—they tend to revolve around things that I consume. Medication—getting on my medication was hell when I was younger because I had this delusion that if I didn’t watch exactly where they were at all times, someone would swap my pills with something else. My regiment would get cocked-up, because if I didn’t carry them with me at all times, I had to bin them.”
Avery frowns. “I’m guessing they don’t like giving refills for that reason.”
Alejandro chuckles softly. “Not particularly, no. I had to get special permission from my doctor, and it was one of the first things we worked through. I still have trouble with it.” He taps