to be frank, I think we’ve reached a point where this shared custody arrangement just isn’t working. Maybe you guys should consider adoption…”
“But…”
“Alice,” Chance says, his tone softening, “wouldn’t you rather each of the pups had their own home, with a family who dotes on them? Rather than being shuffled back and forth between your place and Hank’s farm every week?”
Mrs. Ackerman takes a moment to consider the possibility, her lips pursed in a thoughtful frown. “I suppose…I’d have to vet all the potential parents, though. Criminal checks and so on…”
“Of course,” Chance says with a placating wave of his hand.
“I think Rock’s interested in getting a new dog for the orchard,” I tell her, figuring it might sweeten the situation if one of the pups were to go to someone she knows already.
“Oh, of course, that poor man,” Mrs. A says with a mournful shake of her head. “He must be so lonely out there since Zari passed.”
I nod solemnly in agreement, although I honestly have no idea if that’s the case or not. “Absolutely.”
With a decisive nod, Mrs. Ackerman reaches across Chance’s desk and scoops up her photos, returning them to her purse. “Alright then, Chance. I’ll leave it to you to tell Hank we’ve settled on adoption.” And in a similar whirlwind to the one she arrived in, she departs Chance’s office.
“Dog people,” he mutters, shaking his head. “I can’t believe she took photos of his garbage.”
“I can’t believe she went to the trouble of actually having them developed. I didn’t even realize photo counters still existed.”
He lets out a soft chuckle, bringing a hand up to run through his sandy hair. “Where were we?”
“Uh, you were telling me there’s something wrong with my file…”
“Oh, right. Well, you don’t need to worry, there’s nothing wrong. It’s just that your individual assets make you ineligible for summary dissolution,” he explains. “In California, if either party in the marriage owns serrate property worth more than forty-five grand it disqualifies them from seeking summary dissolution.”
“That seems ridiculous,” I growl. “It’s not like Jesse and I own my place together.”
“That’s what serrate means,” Chance says, as though he’s talking to a five-year-old.
I slump back in my chair, letting out a heavy breath. “So…divorce. That’s it? That’s the only option?”
“The only option if you want to end the marriage,” Chance says, offering a pointed look.
“And we’ll need to go through court? Jesse will need a lawyer of his own?”
Chance shakes his head. “No. It doesn’t need to be as complicated as that. I can have the papers drawn up for you this week, then you both sign them, I file them, and then in six months it’s all finalized and the marriage officially ends.”
Six months…Jesus. That does sound less complicated than I’d anticipated, though.
“However,” Chance continues, his expression serious, “just because it can be done that simply doesn’t mean it will be. Jesse’s entitled to seek his own counsel, and legally he’s entitled to a settlement from you, and you from him.”
I stare at Chance in complete bafflement. “But we don’t have any joint assets or anything…”
“No, but you’re married, and I can’t imagine you took the time to sign a prenup stating you’d both leave the marriage with what you came in with, so…”
“It doesn’t matter. Neither of us want a settlement,” I say with absolute conviction. “We just want it wrapped up as painlessly as possible.”
Chance nods. “Okay. I’ll get started on those papers.”
13
From the private Facebook group ‘Finchley Locals Community Hangout’
* * *
Post by Alice Ackerman: After careful consideration I’ve decided to put Fifi’s babies up for adoption. Any interested parents will need to undergo a thorough background check before taking a dog home.
Hank Latham reply to Alice Ackerman’s post: YOU’VE decided?? We’re supposed to be co-parents here Alice!
Alice Ackerman reply to Hank Latham’s comment: You gave up your rights to co-parent with your shameful neglect!
Hank Latham reply to Alice Ackerman’s comment: What neglect?
Alice Ackerman reply to Hank Latham’s comment: GENERIC FOOD! Do you realize what damage that could do to growing pups??
Hank Latham reply to Alice Ackerman’s comment: By feeding them?
Rock Goode reply to Alice Ackerman’s post: I’ll take a pup, it’ll love it on the orchard
Axel Goode reply to Rock Goode’s comment: Are you sure you’d pass the background check after that thing in Belize?
Rock Goode reply to Axel Goode’s comment: Remind me never to tell you anything. Ever.
* * *
Jesse
* * *
After Zack drops me home from the surprise visit to the clinic, I spend the