in custody and Max and me saving his ass. And I really don’t want to play this card, especially after he lost two people last night. But I have no choice. “You made a deal with me, Jake. You made a deal and that’s why you’re not rotting in federal prison right now. So let’s make a new deal.”
“Fuck you,” he yells, standing up. His fists and jaw are clenching in unison. “I gave up four fucking years of my life for what? Those people they arrested last night weren’t Company. The whole thing was a bust. And I lost again.” He stresses the word. Hard.
He knows I can’t argue about that. He’s the one who takes the fall. It’s been that way since he made his choice to ditch the FBI and work alone. “It doesn’t matter. You got a lot of bad people off the streets of Denver, brother. You did your job and now you’re done.”
“Yeah,” he says, walking over to the terrace door and sliding it open. “I’m done.” He turns back to me, the cold wind from outside blowing past his face and catching his hair. “I’m out of here. You can do whatever you want with that Company girl, but I’m officially retired. I want everything you promised back in that interrogation room. Everything. I want that kid I told you about who went missing four years ago and I want my name erased from all the police reports they’re writing today. I’m not taking the fall for this, Jax. I won’t do it.”
“Hey, I said it’s done. And it is. It might take time to get the kid—”
“Fuck you and your time.” His eyes blaze as he walks back into the cold room. “And I want access to everything you took out of my apartment.”
“That’s FBI evidence, Jake. You know this.”
He sweeps his arm across an end table and shit goes flying. A lamp crashes against the wall and shatters, a plant lands on the coffee table, the dirt spilling out all over it. “Get it back!” he roars. “Get it back or I will turn your ass in. I will tell them, Jax. I will tell them everything we’ve been doing. I’m not even fucking around.”
I let out a long sigh. “I’ll get it back. I will. But I have to work on this case. I have to get back to that girl in Nebraska. Like today. I can’t leave her alone for too long.”
“Put a babysitter on her.”
“I will. I mean, I have. My street partner is watching her Kansas house right now, but my partner’s not one of us, so she doesn’t know about the Nebraska safe house. So if this girl walks out on me, there’s no one there to follow her. It’s a critical moment, Jake. Nick Tate is in the picture. He’s probably making a move right now. So I need to get back to Nebraska and work this shit out.”
Jake walks back to the chair, takes a seat, and pulls out another smoke. He draws in deep as he lights it, and then blows it out into the room already thick with haze. “I just lost everything.”
“It wasn’t yours to lose.” It’s a low blow, but someone’s gotta say it, and since Max isn’t here, I’m the only one who can.
“I don’t know how to get past this, Jake. You have no idea what was happening in my life the past few months.”
“I have some idea.”
He shoots me a look.
“And I’m not judging, OK? I’m not. But do you really want to throw away twelve years of waiting and planning so you can mourn?” I wait for an answer but he stays silent. “Or do you want me to get the fuck out of here and go find Tate? Because this is the decision, Jake. Nick Tate’s time is up. But that guy is like a cat. He’s got spare lives tucked away in hell. So it’s possible he gets to Sasha first and turns on the charm. We both know what an accomplished liar he was when we were kids. Just imagine how good he is at this game by now.”
“Sasha?” he sneers. “You’re on a first-name basis now?”
But I stay silent. He can’t know how conflicted she makes me. He can’t know.
Another drag, more smoke, and then finally a sigh that says I give up. “What do you want me to do?”
“Nothing.”
He shoots me a sidelong look that says, Try again.
But I’m not lying.