bury my face in my rolled-up jacket that I’m using as a pillow, and just the thought of it makes my body stiffen with agony. I had been a little stiff after I climbed down from Eliph’s back yesterday, but I hadn’t even noticed it anymore by the time we stopped walking for the night. My feet had been killing me, but that was about it. Obviously, it all waited to ambush me while I was sleeping.
A weak groan escapes me, and I flop an arm. Even my arms hurt. If that wasn’t punishment enough, I can’t even move enough to get away from the terrible smell assaulting me.
“You look like something a centaur shit out,” a familiar goblin voice informs me happily.
I may not be able to move, but I can curl my fingers except for the single bird flying free in the center. Despite the gesture, I’m relieved at having someone familiar nearby rather than waking up mangled by some wild creature or lost alone in the forest, as had been plaguing my dreams much of the night.
“Now, now, that’s not polite,” he laughs, and I lift my head weakly.
“Yes, because you’re so polite. And if I look like shit, that’s nothing compared to the smell coming off you.”
“Off me?” he queries.
He leans over, a smile beaming in his face, and the horrible smell gets more pungent. My eyes narrowing, I draw my head back in disgust from the source of the odor: a small clay bowl in which he’s using some kind of stone to grind the contents. He scoops up a glop of the cloudy green mixture on his finger and grins devilishly at me.
“I’m afraid you’ve got that wrong. In just a few moments, this lovely smell is going to be coming off you.”
That stinky… paste… on me? Oh, hell no!
“Yeah… I don’t think so. Eliph!” I shout, just to make sure I have backup.
There’s a rustle, and I manage to smirk victoriously at the goblin as I hear heavy footsteps approach in response to my shout.
“I’m here, ahandral,” he murmurs sweetly.
The unicorn’s voice flows over me soothingly and I turn my head toward the direction of his voice, relieved to be hearing it with my ears rather than the disembodied mind speech that we shared all day yesterday.
I point an accusing finger at Grimsal and manage a small pout for the protective male hovering anxiously beside me. Is it unfair? Probably. All I know is that I don’t want the horrible gunk anywhere near me and that the unicorn will likely flatten anyone who touches me without permission.
“Your goblin friend is threatening to put that horrible stuff on me. Can you do something about him, please?”
Grimsal widens his eyes at me and passes the bowl over my head to… my so-called mate. My mouth gapes open, and I whip my head around to stare at the goblin in disbelief. He gives me a wry smile and shrugs.
“Sorry, I value my hands…They’re just too valuable to part with,” he says, wiggling the digits at me. “Your mate gave me the go-ahead to whip this up for you when he saw how much you are suffering from the day before. A good rub with this stuff and you’ll be as good as new. He will be doing the honors though—not I.”
Craning my head around, I give Eliph a gimlet eye, silently daring him to even so much as approach me with that stuff. Don’t get me wrong. The concept isn’t beyond me. I’ve heard of Bengay, and it’s horrible enough—but it’s just not the same. The concoction that the goblin came up with smells somehow even worse than that.
“No,” I growl between my teeth, making Eliph frown at me in dismay.
“Ahandral, please. Your muscles are hurting from the riding you did yesterday, and we still have a lot of distance to cover over the next several days. This will help.”
I give it a dubious glance and turn a hopeful look on him.
“It looks disgusting. Can’t you just magic me up or something?”
“My healing magic does not work like that,” he admits. “I can infuse substances, usually influencing the properties of my well, to work on ailments, but I can’t just… magic it away, as you say.”
“Great. Are you going to whammy the goo then?” I ask, my nose wrinkling with distaste.
Is it me, or is the smell getting stronger? Does whatever is in it respond to insults and go more rank with each complaint? It seems