standing. “I was supposed to meet your father today about getting your business after the wedding, talking about some ideas for launching the resort collection.”
He sighs. “Listen. You’ve done a capable job on our PR. The last person we hired couldn’t get the story right.”
“The story?” I echo.
He cocks his head and lowers his voice. “You’re a smart woman. Don’t tell me you haven’t figured it out. The story that this is a fairy tale wedding and my bride and I are in love?” His mouth twists sardonically.
It takes a moment for the words to sink in. When they do, I feel blindsided. “You’re not in love.”
“No. Like anything else, it’s business. The photography shoot at the Vineyard was a smart move. Make the world feel like they got to witness something private, something that wasn’t meant for the cameras. I see that now.”
I struggle to catch up. I knew their relationship was unconventional, but had dismissed it as that.
“My bride wants a piece of this company,” he goes on. “The profile. The platform.”
God, it’s so clinical. I hate thinking of it that way.
But that’s what you and Ben were doing, right?
I shake that off. I almost don’t ask my question, but it seems inevitable.
“And what do you want?”
A haunted expression flits across his face, something like hope chased by despair. “Things I thought I could have.”
There’s bitter edge in his voice. He’s still not telling me everything.
Only this time, I sense that what he’s keeping from me, he keeps from everyone.
He has feelings for her.
The possibility has my chest swelling.
I reach for his arm through the tailored jacket, and he stiffens as I say, “Something real can come from something fake, Aiden. Trust me.”
When I get home after a long workday, still thinking about Aiden Vane and his bride, Lil pounces. "You're so busted. You were at Ben's all weekend. What did you do?"
"Hung out."
"Uh-huh."
I step out of my heels, wiggling my toes. "We left the apartment at least once a day."
Her eyes round. "You're joking. You can't have sex all day long. Can you?"
I make an assessing noise. "Pretty much."
"But you have to eat. And drink."
I set my bag by the door and head to the living room. "There's delivery. And Ben has a water dispenser in his fridge."
"Marry him," she says.
I laugh, but it does feel as if we could be in one another's lives in an entirely new way. I want that, so much.
The way he acted this weekend makes me think he might want it, too.
He makes room for me in his routines. We talk about traveling. We always talked about books and movies, but it's entirely different doing it in his arms, arguing until his eyes warm and I know he's about to try to convince me using entirely unfair tactics.
"Something came for you." Lil's words bring me back as she goes to the kitchen and returns, holding up a postcard.
I stiffen before I even read the text on the front.
Portugal. A stone street, curving and lined with windows boasting riotous flower baskets. It's beautiful and it makes my stomach plummet.
"Let me guess,” my sister starts, her voice echoing in my buzzing ears. “Nowhere in this weekend did it happen to come up that you slept with him a decade ago?”
“No.” I sink onto the arm of the couch, the comfort of the padded form doing nothing to ease the guilt in my stomach. "But you have to understand why keeping it from him felt like the right decision.”
At first I was angry with him, I didn’t want to admit how hurt and ashamed I was that we slept together, that I wanted him and he wanted her.
Later, after I saw what a decent guy he was—that Ben wasn’t only smart and attractive and funny, but loyal to his friends, his family—I let myself start hanging out with him again.
But the closer we got, the more I didn’t want to confess and risk losing him over it. As time went on, there seemed less and less point in digging up the past. Eventually, I could pretend I’d almost forgotten it.
“That was years ago,” Lil points out. “You’ve both changed, and if Vi was here she would’ve changed too. Are you willing to walk away from Ben because of this? Or worse, lie to him?”
Seeing Aiden Vane this morning, the weight he’s carrying and the secret between them, makes me realize both are awful.
“I didn’t just keep it from him to protect my feelings, Lily.