I could get my heart broken if I let myself fall too far.
“I’m not sure I’m the right person to ask that question to,” I answered Nadine’s question.
“Who would I ask? I mean if I asked Gran and Pop-Pop, they of course would say yes, but if I asked Mom or Dad, they’d say no. So who do you ask?”
“I guess maybe it’s something you have to decide for yourself.” I rolled to my side, tucking my hands under my cheek as I peered over at her. “How much do you feel you’re willing to risk?”
She seemed to think about it for a minute. “I don’t know. I would hate to end up like Mom and Dad. But I suppose there’s always a chance I could end up like Gran and Pop-Pop, or at least somewhere close to it, right?”
“Yes,” I agreed.
“It’s too bad there isn’t some type of guarantee or way to know for sure.”
It was the same thing that she brought up in the car yesterday. It appeared that she was looking for some proof that what she was feeling was real or that the relationship she was having with her boss would last. But I was pretty sure that there were no guarantees and no foolproof way to know if something would last forever or not.
I went back to what I had told her the day before. “I suppose a lasting relationship happens in the day-to-day. You have to work at it and not get complacent or let something get in between you two. You can’t spend too much time apart like Mom and Dad did. And you can’t let your own ego be more important than everything else, also like Mom and Dad did.”
She turned onto her back and lifted her arms under her head. “You’re really no help at all, you know that?”
I laughed. “I’m sorry. But I’m the little sister. I’m supposed to get all these answers from you.”
She snorted. “Yeah, well, when I have them, I’ll let you know.”
I slept in the next day, and like the day before, I found my grandparents in the kitchen making breakfast, this time their famous western omelet, and Nadine was out on the sun porch with coffee. This time she was on her phone and seemed to be texting someone.
I grabbed my own cup of coffee and went out to join her, looking out over the backwoods of the house and thinking maybe of taking another hike or walking over to where I knew there were wild blueberries and picking some.
“How would you feel if we left after breakfast?” Nadine asked me, putting her phone down beside her and picking up her coffee.
“You’re my ride, so if you need to get back, I can be ready.” I studied her, wondering if something work-related came up. “Is there something wrong back in the city?”
“He wants to know if I’ll see him for dinner tonight.”
“By he, you mean your boss boyfriend?” I asked.
She nodded. “We’ve never gone out to dinner before. What do you suppose that means?”
I shook my head in amusement at how analytical my sister was being in this relationship with her boss. “I don’t know. It seems like maybe it’s a good sign, don’t you think?”
She grimaced. “I don’t know. Maybe he wants to take me out in public to break up with me. You know I’m not one to make a scene in a public place. He probably knows that.”
I rolled my eyes. “If he’s the type of guy to do that, then you’re probably better off without him. And of course, it’s quite possible that it’s the opposite. Maybe he’s wanting to take the relationship into something more serious.”
“Except, we’re not supposed to be dating. We could get fired.”
“Maybe he’s figured out a solution around that.”
All of a sudden, she looked horrified. “You don't think he’d fire me just so he could date me, do you?”
I let out a loud laugh because she was being hilarious. At the same time, I could understand the craziness going on in her brain. I certainly had some of that going on whenever I tried to figure out what was between Theo and me. My solution was just to go with the flow in the moment and not worry about what could come. Yes, of course, I wanted to be careful so that my seeing him didn’t influence my future, but in terms of whatever future Theo and I had, I was just going to play it