I’m okay. I’ll be okay. It hurts like a bitch now, but it’s worth it. Having you here, like this.”
“I’m sorry.” I force the words out over the lump in my throat. “I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. I just couldn’t find the words... and I hated you. God, I hated you for leaving me with him and turning your back on me.”
With gritted teeth, Conner manages to shift slightly so we’re face to face. “I would never turn my back on you, K. You mean too fucking much to me. But after I got your message asking me to leave you alone, I figured I’d finally lost you.”
“I didn’t send you a message, Conner.”
“So who—” His expression darkens as he sucks in a harsh breath. “Warren.”
“He must have seen it and replied to you. He often went through my phone.”
“Fuck, babe, why didn’t you reach out to me? It almost fucking killed me, leaving you. But you chose him. After we... you picked him.”
“I didn’t.”
“W-what?” He blinks, wincing with agony. “What the fuck are you saying, K?”
“It was you, Conner.” I offer him a sad smile. “It was always you.”
After my confession, Conner held me until he fell back to sleep. I finally crept out and got showered and changed into some clean clothes courtesy of Hadley. Now I’m sitting in the Jaggers’ kitchen, eating pancakes, while Ellen tends to Conner.
“Are we all going to ignore the fact that Con is upstairs, pissing blood?” Ace snarls the words, his anger swirling around us. “And my money is on you being the cause.” His icy glare cuts me to the bone, but I stand my ground.
I deserve his wrath, but he doesn’t know the whole story.
I just don’t know if I can tell them yet.
“Ace, relax,” Cole says, surprising everyone.
“Don’t tell me you’re siding with her? Conner was fine before she showed up and started messing with his head.”
“Ace,” Hadley warns. “There are things you don’t understand.”
“Hadley’s right, babe. You need to calm down.”
“Calm down?” he roars, slamming his fist against the counter. The plates jangle and rattle, and Cole’s juice almost spills but he snatches it up just in time. “He could have gotten himself killed.”
“I didn’t mean for any of this to happen,” I say, my heart beating hard in my chest. “I—”
“What? You what, Kennedy? Spit it out, because I’d love to hear all about how you screwed my brother ov—”
“Warren raped me.” The words pierce the air like a gunshot.
“Fuck,” Cole hisses.
“Warren didn’t just beat me that night... He... he raped me.”
Remi’s eyes shutter as she inhales a sharp breath. Hadley offers me a sad smile. But Ace... Ace looks murderous.
“It wasn’t the first time,” I swallow the lump in my throat, “but he’d never lost it like that before...”
“He... raped you?” Ace looks repulsed.
“Babe.” Remi lays her hand on his arm.
“I didn’t want anyone to know. Especially Conner.”
“I told him,” Hadley admits. “l let it slip, and I guess he couldn’t deal.”
“Really?” Ace hisses. “Fuck, Hadley. What were you thinking?”
“You need to back down, brother.” Cole moves to her side. “This isn’t Hadley’s fault. Just like it isn’t Kennedy’s fault. The only person to blame for any of this, is that piece of shit Warren.”
“Look, I’m—”
“Kennedy, dear,” Ellen appears in the doorway, “he’s asking for you.”
“We can talk about this later,” I say, unable to meet Ace’s murderous stare.
“Go,” Hadley says. “We’ll check in later.”
I don’t hang around, taking the stairs two steps at a time.
Outside Conner’s room, I give myself a second to catch my breath. I know there’s no going back now. Seeing Conner lying there like that, not knowing if he was dead or alive, has only cemented what, deep down, I already knew.
I still love him.
Part of me never stopped.
But somewhere along the way, love turned into hate, and the lines between our friendship began to blur.
I don’t knock, slipping inside.
“Hey.” He gives me a crooked smile. “I missed you.”
“I was barely gone an hour.”
“What were you all talking about?”
“You, mostly.” My heart is so heavy at the mess I’ve made. “Ace isn’t happy with either of us.”
“He’ll get over it. Come here.” He pats the bed and I go to him. “I don’t know what Ellen gave me, but I can’t feel my face.”
“That’s a shame.” I smile, gently stroking his jaw. “Because I really wanted to do this.”
Closing the space between us, I let my lips brush over his with the faintest touch. Easing back, I giggle when