if deep in thought, before turning to gaze into my eyes.
‘What’s wrong?’ I said, concerned.
The smile he gave me was rueful. ‘I’m just wishing I had more power in this place. There are rules I cannot break.’
I arched an eyebrow. ‘You’re plenty powerful, Anyan. And what rules are you talking about?’
He shook his head sadly, as if regretting what he had to say. ‘It doesn’t matter, Jane. I must take what I can get. I’ve been looking for you everywhere. I’m just happy I found you.’
‘Found me? Was I lost?’ At this point I was totally confused.
‘No, I’m the one that’s lost. So I built this place for you. For us. I hoped you’d find it.’
His words made no sense, but nothing could permeate my curious calm. Plus, he sounded happy, and I liked what he’d said.
‘It’s beautiful, Anyan. I really like it. It’s ours?’
‘For as long as I can hold on to it,’ he said, and there was grief in his voice.
‘I’ll help you,’ I said, putting my small hand into his much larger one. ‘We’ll keep it, together.’ I wanted him to feel safe, like I did.
He leaned forward, pressing his lips to mine. What I felt then was anything other than calm. Our kiss was brief, but passionate, leaving me burning for more when he withdrew to speak.
‘You’re already helping me. Being here with you reminds me of who I am. You help me remain me, Jane.’
I was confused again, but then he stood, taking me by the hand to draw me up with him. He led me to the little sleeping area.
My body kindled with its own fire as Anyan stripped me of my shirt. While he did so, I toed off my Converse. He started in on the buttons of my jeans even as I stood on the tip of one sock, and then the other, to pull them off. He pushed down my jeans, and when I was clad only in my bra and panties, he bore me down onto the soft furs that awaited us.
His lips and teeth found the soft flesh of my neck even as I ripped at the bottom of his T-shirt, trying to pull it up his body and off him. I wanted – no, I needed to feel his skin pressed against mine.
My hunger was so desperate it surprised me. Surely we’d made good use of this warm, soft nook hundreds of times before? But it was like I hadn’t touched the barghest in months. As if he felt the same way, Anyan’s mouth and hands roved over my body like he was relearning me, or grasping on to me so no one could take me from him.
‘Gods, I’ve missed this, Jane,’ he said, his voice raspy with lust and maybe something else. Sadness? I wondered, unable to understand and yet feeling the same mixture of lust and mourning, as if I’d have to say goodbye to Anyan again after this was over.
But why goodbye? And why again? I wondered. For a second I thought I remembered, but then the memory was gone as if it were ejected.
Nothing could be as bad as all that, not with a barghest in my arms.
I’d finally managed to wrestle his shirt over his head, and Anyan helped me by pulling it the rest of the way up his arms. Then he was hovering over me, looking over my body with hungry eyes. Boldly, I moved my hand between his legs, stroking over his hard length covered by the denim that still separated us. He moaned, a low growling sound, then found my mouth again in a long, rough kiss that left me breathless.
When he moved again, it was with purpose. Kissing down my throat, over my sternum, his hands moved behind my back to undo my bra. Rather than take it off, once it was undone, he merely pushed it up, finding my nipple with his hungry, rough mouth. I whimpered, pushing up against him, still stroking him through his jeans as he found my other breast with his lips. At the same time, he grabbed one wrist, and then the other, ripping my hand away from him as he pulled them up over my head. Then he pinned them down, moving up my body at the same time so that he could kiss me again, pressing against me.
I drew my knees up, opening myself to him. Even through his jeans and my panties I could feel him, so hard and