in a relationship for a whole year after I left Sedona Sunset, but I met this man on the plane and I had a few too many vodka and cranberries—which I like because I think the cranberry juice is so tart and refreshing—and this man was devastatingly attractive, let me tell you. Whew! So I … well, I guess I just lost my head. And then when our flight got sent to Washington instead of Raleigh because of a storm, I ended up going to a hotel with this man and … oh! Have I gone over my time limit?”
“No!” the room shouted in unison.
“Well, good. So, even though I’m not supposed to be with a man, I found myself in a hotel room with one and I was stone-cold sober by that time. Let me assure ya’ll, I knew exactly what I was doing, and I told myself it wasn’t relapse because my issues involve latching onto men and trapping them in relationships because of what they can do for me, you know? But not for sex! Never for sex! I’ve always been a kind of take-it-or-leave-it kind of girl. But the funniest thing happened that night…”
Dante let his body slide even farther down into the folding chair. Another half inch and the laws of physics would take over and his ass would be on the floor. He braced his legs to keep himself from falling into the puddle of coffee.
“… made love over and over and over again. And I say ‘made love’ instead of … well, a cruder term some people might use … because that’s what it felt like. I mean, we just seemed to connect perfectly. It was magic. It was the most passionate and beautiful sexual experience of my whole life, and at one point, I thought I couldn’t take any more, but I surprised myself. Then he fell asleep and started snoring like a hibernating bear…”
I do not snore like a damn bear.
“… so I got my things together and snuck out of there. And look, I know I’ll never see him again, but the truth is I can’t stop thinking of him. It’s been weeks and weeks and I can’t get his face and voice and incredible body out of my darn head! That body of his was insane!”
“Did you get his name?”
“A number?”
The questions popped up simultaneously from women on opposite sides of the room, even though AA members weren’t supposed to offer feedback during someone’s sharing. But hey, Dante figured so many rules had been broken in this meeting that it hardly mattered. He dared take a peek around the room—everyone in attendance was staring at Taffy with wide-eyed disbelief.
“I did get his name, yes, thank you for asking, but I have a feeling he was lying to me, if you can believe the nerve.”
Yeah. Right. The nerve.
“And no, I do not have a number, which is probably for the best, because I think if I did I wouldn’t have the restraint to not call him, and if I ever saw that man again I would be done for. I mean, if I saw him again, I wouldn’t care what my therapist said. I’d probably just rip my clothes off and throw myself at him. Now, I should probably mention at this point that I do not throw myself at men as a rule, but for him I would make an exception.”
Oh, fuck.
Silence. Then someone coughed. Someone cussed under his breath.
“Thankyousoverymuch.”
And with that, she sat down.
The young guy sitting next to Dante looked at him and frowned. “You good, pops? Need a hand?”
“I’ve got it.” Dante slowly pushed himself back in the folding chair, making no noise whatsoever.
The dude smiled at Dante and whispered, “I know, right? I almost fell out of my chair, too. That was the hottest fuckin’ thing I’ve ever heard at an AA meeting, and I am so gonna get that little piece of ass to come home with me.”
Dante slowly leaned in toward the kid and kept his voice barely audible. “How old are you?”
“Nineteen, but I dig older chicks.”
Dante nodded. “Here’s the situation—if you go within twenty feet of that woman, I will shoot you. I’m a federal agent assigned to protect her.”
The guy chuckled. “Right. And I’m Spider-Man.”
Without making his clothing rustle or the old chair squeak, Dante displayed his weapon and shield. “We cool, Spidey?”
The kid swallowed hard. He looked like he was going to piss himself, or cry, and his eyes