you hear as truth, Alex. I haven’t actually had a girlfriend since I came to Dallas and I’ll be honest, sleeping with my play partners has gotten boring.”
He wanted something more. He wanted the connection that came when a Dom and a sub truly fit together, when their needs dovetailed and they could give to each other.
“I thought you were humping Kori’s sister.”
Not for all the money in the world. Shawna was a hot mess with a tendency to addiction and a severe narcissistic bent. How they were even siblings he had no idea. “She’s a patient. I don’t fuck patients.”
Or employees. Even when he really, really wanted to. He had to wonder if Kori wasn’t the real reason he’d lost interest in Sanctum’s pretty subs.
The ones who weren’t scared of him anyway. He was known for being a bit more hardcore in his play than the other Doms. Hell, some of the subs called him Dexter—the undercover sadist.
He wasn’t undercover, damn it. He put that shit right out there. It was probably why he didn’t date much. Hello, my name is Kai and I would really like to hurt you. But only if you enjoy getting hurt. How about some coffee? We could talk about the proper use of exotic anal plugs.
Yeah, that sent the ladies running and not into his arms.
“Is Erin all right?” Alex asked, his tone turning serious.
“She’s fucked up in numerous ways.” And ways he couldn’t talk about with Alex because no matter what or who paid the bills, she was his patient and he took that seriously. He wouldn’t tell Alex that Erin’s issues hadn’t started with Theo. No. Theo’s death was merely the latest in a long line of deep disappointments and scarring episodes that made up Erin’s life.
How was she going to handle being a mother?
“You don’t think she’s a danger to herself?”
Kai shook his head. “No. And now that the pregnancy issue can be dealt with, I actually think she’ll be careful. The question is going to be what happens once the child is born. I don’t honestly know that Erin will feel like she deserves a child.”
“Deserves?” Alex sounded horrified, but then Alex hadn’t grown up the way Erin had. Kai happened to know that Alex had been his parents’ darling child, beloved and sheltered. Not that a sheltered existence couldn’t lead to heartache, as Alex and Eve discovered, but how a person grew up, the love and support they got from their parents, could make the difference in how they handled tragedy.
“This is something I’ll try to work through with Erin.” To say any more would be to break Erin’s trust, and he refused to be one more man to do that. “Since you’re here, I suppose the mission is still on.”
“Don’t sound so excited,” Alex said with a shake of his head. “Yes, I talked to my FBI contacts this morning and the op is a go. The advance production team flew in last night. They’ll be scouting locations in the area including Sanctum and the McKay-Taggart building.”
“Is Ian sure he wants to do this? I don’t think he understands the kind of disruption something like filming a movie can bring.” A production company was filming the adaptation of a book titled Love After Death. It happened to be a book written by a woman named Serena Dean-Miles, a close friend of Kai’s. Her husbands—yeah, she was a traditional kind of girl—Jake and Adam, worked for McKay-Taggart. As far as Kai could tell, the romantic series Soldiers and Doms that Serena wrote under the pen name Amber Rose was pretty much fictional retellings of the lives of McKay-Taggart operatives.
He was totally hoping Ian figured out Love After Death was all about him.
“Ian is working with the feds on more than one op right now,” Alex admitted. “Let’s just say he’s in a quid pro quo situation with them.”
He was scratching their backs so they would scratch his. “What does Big Tag need the feds for?”
Alex sat back, his expression going stony. “You have your secrets and we have ours. I need to know if you’re ready. If you don’t think you can handle this, I’ll try to convince them to let me run point on this op.”
The production team was coming to Sanctum for more than realism. They were coming because the star of Love After Death needed a mentor. The lead actor had requested a Dom to mentor him through the role of the crop-wielding ex-spy whose