what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged; but one word from you will silence me on this subject for ever.” ― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
Madison
It’d been weeks since I’d seen any of the Sinclairs. After my encounter with Tamlin at the library, I even avoided her like the plague. My heart already felt heavy, I couldn’t deal with anything else.
“You’ve got a package, it’s in your room,” my mom yelled as I entered the front door.
“Thanks,” I said, and headed to my room. I glanced at my nightstand and there was a USB. I took it over to the computer and loaded it. It was a music. When I read the title, I felt a tear escape my eyes; a tear that I didn’t even know was there.
Kyler loves Maddy
I hit play. The first song was Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard. His haunting voice interlaced with the longing of a man and a woman who want each other but can’t really manage to say exactly the words that will connect them, before building a relationship and finding true connection with each other, finding peace. Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol started playing. I closed my eyes and let the music wash over me, listening to the lyrics of longing, need, forgiveness and passion. I went to the next song. Maps by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. A sweet song that still had some sad undertones. I couldn’t help thinking how appropriate it was for this whole situation. The tears drenched my face and fell down with sorrow, regret, and most of all anger. I was so angry that this was happening. But I knew it would be better for Kyler to hate me for being the girl that broke his heart than to find out that he fell in love with his predator's biological child.
“Sweetie,” my mom said, as she gently knocked on my bedroom door. I turned to look at her and she rushed towards me. “Maddy, what’s wrong?”
“I broke up with Kyler,” I said, almost crawling into my mother’s arms. I longed to be small again, where the only thing that I needed to feel better was her arms wrapped around me, and a gentle peck on my head.
“I didn’t even know you and Kyler were a thing,” my mom said, holding me and swaying us back and forth, the motion calming me. “He’s got some demons, that one.”
“Mom, is Pierce Black my father?” I blurted while wiping at my tears.
My mom pulled back from me, holding her arms out so she could see my face. Then one lonely tear fell down her face. “No, honey, Michael Evans is your father. But you wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for Pierce Black. I’m sorry, Maddy; I never wanted you to find out. I never wanted to come back here, I wanted to leave it all behind me but then Monica offered me this job. I thought the money and the opportunities it would bring you would be worth the risk. But I was wrong, it's not worth it.”
“I’m sorry. I am so sorry that any of this happened to you,” I said, throwing my arms around her. “I am so sorry you had to be reminded of him--of that night--my entire life.”
“So, for eighteen years,” she said, wiping away my tears, “you were born of love. You were wanted, and you were loved. Not one day did I ever look at you and think anything other than that’s my daughter and I love her more than my own life. Nothing that man did was your fault.” She pulled back so we were face to face, so I could look into her eyes and she could look into mine. “You know that, right?” she asked, and as much as I wanted to say I knew, I still felt that pang of guilt. So I did the one thing I could, I threw my arms around her.
“I love you, Mom.”
“So, what happened between you and Kyler?” she whispered in my ear, and her hand gently soothed my hair back, something she had done my whole life.
“The past happened. I can’t change the past.”
“Oh, sweetie, you can’t change anything in life. The only thing you can control is yourself and your actions. What others do or have done are no reflection of the person you are, my love.”
“I’m scared, Mom.”
“One thing I know, anything in life worth having should scare you.” She kissed