I could thank people, say hi to total strangers, and hug my enemies. I feel as bright as a child. I feel like all of my problems are so small in the grand scope of everything. In this moment, everything that defines me as a person is stripped away, and all that’s left are the bare, fragile, innocent pieces I’ve protected since I was a kid let loose on the sunny California beaches.
And in this state of mind, I can see my future with Toby.
And I know I can be truly happy with him.
Then the curtain rises before I’m ready, and it’s okay, because I take in the audience, the setting of the college library, and say Kingsley’s first words.
The rest is history.
From Toby’s nervous yet powerful first entrance as Danny, to our first kiss in scene four when even the audience holds their breath, to the curtain at intermission, we couldn’t have asked for a better first impression of our show.
“Do you see?” Ms. Joy tells us backstage during intermission. “You’ve taken this script and made it into something more than just the words on the page. I am so, so proud of you. Goodness, my husband may not leave me after all, with all the late nights putting this together has caused.” And to all that, Tamika politely leans in and reminds her, “It’s only act one. We still have a whole other act.”
Act two goes just as well as the first. And in the final scene when Kingsley and Danny embrace one another for one last kiss before the curtain closes on our story, I fall out of character for a moment, my eyes searching Toby’s. And I suspect he has a similar experience, for his lips curl upward, betraying the emotion of the scene, and for a flicker of an instant, I don’t see Danny; I see a guy who is proud that he just got through opening night of ‘I’ll Always Remember Seaside’ and rendered all of Spruce speechless with his performance. And damn it, I’m proud of him, too.
And that’s precisely the feeling we leave the audience with, as the curtains close on our joined faces.
The auditorium explodes with applause as the curtains rise again with all the rest of the cast among us, and we take our bow. I grip Toby’s sweaty hand when the cast separates to allow the pair of us our own bow, and after I take mine, I give a gesture at Toby, letting the whole school explode with screams of joy and proud celebration. Toby is the shining star tonight in Spruce, Texas, and I couldn’t be happier for him.
Apparently more people showed up for the show than Toby was counting on. After we wipe off our stage makeup and change back into our normal clothes, we are surprised upon our exit to the lobby to be met with a secondary wave of applause and cheers from all the people who stuck around. A trio of last year’s grads rush up to congratulate Toby, including TJ, that nice guy from the T&S pastry place, who seems to be seeing Toby in an all-new light. Meanwhile, I’m approached by a number of random strangers who tell me how great a job I did, including some freshmen, who are apparently so inspired by my acting that they are now eager to audition for the upcoming winter show.
I’m still combing the crowd with my eyes, on the lookout for my own parents, when Toby is met by his mother. “You did such a great job, sweetheart!” she cries as she flings her arms around her son’s neck. “I cried when you two came back together in the end!”
“Where’s Carl?” Toby asks when they separate from the hug.
“There’s a game tonight, honey! So he’s there supporting Lee while I’m—Oh, don’t worry, he’ll come to your show tomorrow, I’m sure! Or … Or the Sunday matinée. Totally certain of it!” She titters nervously as her smile tightens.
I see it in Toby’s eyes. He’s not fooled either.
But he smiles anyway, kisses his mom on the cheek, and tells her how happy he is that she’s here. Then he goes into a story of how nervous he was before the show, how I talked him down, and a bunch of other stuff to distract himself from the fact that his stepdad and stepbrother likely won’t support Toby’s show. I don’t know if he was actually expecting them to come, or if the subtle look of