seasick and I hated all those buffets. Or letting my boss bully me. Or letting the clients talk down to me. Or…”
I stopped him, by putting my hand over his and squeezing. I had definitely noticed him changing pronouns halfway through his little rant. “I get the picture. This perfect Dom of yours doesn’t sound like much fun, though. All he does is to stop you from doing things. What does he do that’s sexy?”
He looked up at me with glazed eyes, and I knew he was flying just a little, just from describing his Dom to me. “Oh, he spanks me. And uses toys on me. Sex toys,” he added, as if I possibly had some other idea. “He doesn’t let me have my way in much of anything. Because he knows what’s best for me, you see. But that’s what makes it exciting. It gives me this funny feeling and makes me hard, because I have to do as he says, or I’ll get in trouble and he’ll punish me.”
We were still talking about him. Interesting. “In trouble how? What would this perfect Dom do to punish you?”
“Spankings. Whippings. My dad used to use his belt on me.”
“You know that punishments aren’t meant to be fun, Jordy.”
“I know, but with him, they’re still sexy. I don’t know if there’s anything he could do that would make it not sexy.”
He’d be surprised, but that would be for him to learn later on. I was going to take it nice and slow with him, because the things I’d discussed with Austin were still concerns. So slow was the name of the game for him right now. I had ways to torture him, though. Ways that would still be fun for me.
I tuned back in to what he was saying in that dreamy voice. “And even if I did cry afterward, I know he’ll take me in his arms and make me feel good again. Other things he thinks up, sometimes, just to see if I can handle it. But he never pushes me too much. He knows just how much I can take. I can trust him.”
He seemed to snap out of it a little when I touched him, and I pushed his coffee closer toward his hand. “Drink up, Jordy, your coffee’s getting cold.”
He blinked his eyes several times and rubbed his hand across his face. “Oh, okay.” He took a big sip. “This is really good.”
“Glad you like it.”
“Anyway,” he said, fiddling with the cup. “That’s the kind of Dom I’d like to be.”
“But no Dom has ever lived up to those expectations for you.”
He looked adorably confused. “I-I never looked for a Dom for myself.”
I leaned over and ran the back of my finger down his jaw. “Didn’t you, boy? Haven’t you been looking for that perfect Dom for a really long time…for yourself?”
“I-I…what do you mean? No. I’m a Dom.”
“You may have believed that you were, but you liked your spanking, didn’t you? You asked me for more.”
His face colored so beautifully. “I still don’t think I’m a submissive.” He looked up into my eyes and blinked at me. “Do you think I am?”
Said the lamb to the wolf. He was so sweet right then, I wanted to wrap him up in my arms and never let him go. And the same time I wanted to eat him right up.
“I think you do need to submit, Jordy, and I want to be that person you submit to. You work so hard at being a Dom, and it shouldn’t be such hard work. Why don’t you let me take care of you? All you have to do is let me take control. And you can do that because that’s what a good sub does. It’s time to stop pretending, Jordy. Pretending to be something you’re not.”
I leaned over and captured his mouth. His lips were soft and full against mine, and we kissed for what seemed like ages. Finally, I pushed him away, and he looked up at me with that sweet, earnest expression again.
“But-but even if I am a-a sub, why do you want me? I mean, just look at you.”
“Jordy.” I shook my head. He had no idea how beautiful and sweet he is. How much I wanted him. “I want to find out what this—this thing is between us.”
“Between us?”
“Don’t you want to see where this might take us?”
“Where it might take us?”
I smiled at how he was repeating what I said. I didn’t