the proof is in the bacon strip.”
Tears were starting to form. “You know these are things I can’t unhear.”
Darcy snapped her fingers. “Hey, I know how we can find out for sure. Let’s ask Georgia.”
“Ask Georgia what?”
“That should be proof if it's in the chromosomes or not. Because she was a man and is now a woman. We could answer the age-old question.”
My mouth fell open. “You seriously want to call my ex and find out if she still has skid marks?”
“What? Is that taboo?” Darcy shrugged. “Okay forget I mentioned it.”
“I will be struggling to do just that for the rest of my natural life,” I vowed.
“Or until the next time I’m full of tequila and sage advice.” Darcy held up her margarita and we clinked glasses.
I had to call Darcy’s husband Mike to come to pick her up. As Margarita Monday was a regular occasion, he was expecting the call and made it in record time.
“He doesn’t want to be alone with his mother any more than I do.” Darcy hiccupped as I helped bundle her into her coat. “That and tequila makes my clothes fall off.”
“It’s definitely one of those. Good night, you crazy lush. Have some good sex for all of us who aren’t getting any.”
She threw off a jaunty salute. “Aye aye. It’s a dirty job but someone has to do it.”
I hugged her and then watched her pick her way down the steps. The buzz was still with me but without Darcy’s overwhelming presence the big Victorian felt empty.
Chilled, I headed upstairs and into my bathroom. It was a study in black and white old-world elegance. Black tile, white toilet, and pedestal sink that was shaped like a scallop. A massive white claw-footed tub. I had a little wooden bath tray that my grandfather had carved for me that held a book, a candle, and a container of bath salts.
Looking at it made me think about Robin Goodfellow’s hewn treehouse. I turned my back on it and filled the tub and then stripped off my mud-stained clothes. After pouring in a generous dollop of bubble bath, I stepped into the tub and then closed my eyes, letting my mind drift along with the white noise from the water flowing from the tap.
When the water reached the tippy top, I used a toe to shut it off and then leaned back with a contented sigh.
“Thinking about me?” A male voice purred.
I jumped and water sloshed over the edge of the tub and onto the white fur bathmat. Instinct propelled me to cover my breasts from his intense blue gaze, but the movement was unnecessary as the bubbles preserved my modesty. Still, I wasn’t used to an audience while bathing.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I barked.
Perched on the edge of the tub like he had done so a thousand times before, sat Robin Goodfellow. “Waiting for you to come back to your senses. But then your friend showed up and your conversation with her was too delicious. As is this margarita. Anything special you use?” He held up one of the abandoned glasses, once more filled to the brim.
“Extra lime and a little bit of agave,” I said, unnerved that he was in my space while I was naked. “What did you mean when you said you’d been here all along? I didn’t see you.”
“Ah, it’s one of my little tricks. I can change my form, and even shrink down to the size of a pinhead if I want. Though some things stay proportional, no matter what size I am, if you get my meaning.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
My face blazed with heat. “That was a very private and personal conversation you eavesdropped on.”
“I know.” He grinned, completely unashamed. “I like your friend. She has some interesting ideas.”
Suddenly his voice changed into Darcy’s high-pitched Southern drawl. “And why the hell has no one invented a Bluetooth vibrator yet? There’s a command function that would get used constantly. Alexa, get me off and take the scenic route.” He chuckled and his voice returned to his normal deep drawl. “I can’t say she’s wrong.”
My body was so flushed with heat I was worried I might spontaneously combust. I pointed to the door. “Out. Get out.”
“Not until we talk, lamb. Have you given any further thought to my offer?”
“No. I thought you were a figment of my imagination until you popped in here.” Which reminded me. “Did you drug me with something? Why can’t I remember