a clear view of the strip mall across the street. A woman was closing up the nail salon, testing the locks with both hands before walking away to her car. “Isn’t that where the ice-cream parlor was?” I asked, pointing to the salon.
“They tore it down a couple of years ago and rebuilt the whole thing.”
“I used to go there with Sonya Mukherjee after Spanish class.” In high school, Sonya and I had few friends. We were the only girls in the jazz band; we had last names that teachers always shortened to an initial; we celebrated holidays that were not listed on the school calendar; we were cast as the Magi in the Christmas play every year, despite our protestations that we were girls, always the Magi, with flowing white scarves covering our long hair, and robes dissimulating our budding breasts and hips. We were both thought to be Muslim and Sonya often had to say, No, no, I’m Hindu. Then in September of our sophomore year, two planes were flown into the World Trade Center and strangely that distinction seemed to matter less, not more. We were both called the same names. Ragheads. Talibans. Sometimes, raghead talibans. In Spanish class, at least, we got to be brown kids among other brown kids, an anonymity we craved all the more for its new rarity. After an hour of conjugating verbs—yo me voy, me fui, me iba, me iria, me ire—we often went to get ice cream.
“I remember,” he said.
“You were in Spanish, too?”
“No, I worked at the ice-cream parlor two days a week.”
“Right. Sorry.” An image came back to me now, blurry and yet also solid, of Jeremy Gorecki standing at the cash register in a white polo shirt and red apron, waiting to ring up our orders. I felt the heat rising to my cheeks and was conscious of him noticing it. For a moment, I was quiet, thinking about those long-gone days. Whatever happened to Sonya? She had gotten into NYU and sent enthusiastic emails for the first few weeks, but I hadn’t heard from her in years. I’d have to look her up someday.
“I remember one time you and Sonya got into such a giggling fit you knocked down the spoon rack. The whole place was a mess.”
“For the record, Officer, it was the cup display, and we got kicked out for that.”
“Yeah, sure.”
“But you never got into trouble.”
“?’Course I did.”
“Like what?”
“Kid stuff. I can’t think of anything specific right now.”
“Because there wasn’t any,” I said with a smile. Oh, God, I thought, I’m flirting with him. But it was a distraction from the intolerable fact of loss and the constant feeling of grief. His face was familiar—he had the same blue eyes, the same prominent nose—yet adulthood had made it new again. And the last ten years had clearly left their mark. There was a new hardness around his jawline, tempered by the early signs of crow’s-feet at the corners of his eyes.
I finished my drink and motioned to the waitress that I wanted another one.
“What’s it say?” he asked, looking at the tattoo on my wrist.
“It’s Latin. ‘A voice crying out.’?”
He reached across the table and touched the inside of my wrist, then turned my hand toward the light to get a better look. “Any reason?”
“I went to a rally out in the Bay Area when I was in college. Remember the law that would’ve made felons out of undocumented immigrants? Back in ’06?” He seemed on the verge of saying something about the rally, or the law, but instead he drew back his hand and waited for me to finish the story. “Anyway. When the police ordered us to disperse, I couldn’t find a way out and I got arrested. They put me in zip ties and had me sit on the curb while they waited for transport. It was my first protest, and I couldn’t believe I was getting arrested. All of a sudden it dawned on me that I’d need to be bailed out, my mom would find out, I’d have an arrest record. I kept