know I was attracted to him? Had she heard it in my voice? Was it that obvious? “He wants to talk about the neighborhood. He thinks the nanny guy is local.”
“Yeah, so do I. But why is he talking to you? Why not, say, to Leslie? Or me—I live around here, too. I’ll tell you why. Because Leslie and I happen to be dowdy and married, and you happen to be stunning and single.”
Stunning? Me? I glanced in the mirror, saw definite cheekbones, symmetrical features. But stunning? “Susan, you’re not dowdy. Besides, I’m a therapist. He thinks I’ll have insights about the psychological profile.”
“Sure. That’s it. He’s taking you to a candlelit dinner because you’re a therapist. Zoe, you can’t be that naive.”
“Susan, not everything’s about sex.” I looked at my long black wool skirt. It was comfy, went with everything, had a slit up the back.
“You can’t mean that. Everything certainly is about sex. Unless it’s about food—but even food is about sex, really.”
I shifted the topic. “So you’re sure it’s all right to bring Molly over?”
“Of course. Molly’s always welcome.”
“And you really feel better?” She sounded better. Probably she was. It was a pattern with her, swinging from emotional pits to soaring heights.
“Much better. Zoe, I don’t know what happened, except that I was completely blown away by Tamara’s disappearance. But somehow I’ve got it together again.”
“Did you sleep last night?” I rifled through my sweaters. Purple? Mauve? Red?
“No, but I rested this afternoon. Tim surprised me and came back to town on the red-eye. We had ... a long lunch.” Her voice was a satisfied purr.
I smiled. “Good. I’m glad Tim’s around.” Maybe she’d feel safer now. “Maybe more ‘long lunches’ will stop the nightmares.”
“I doubt it. But they have a definite therapeutic effect. I’m much less tense. My body’s relaxed and my complexion’s cleared up. At least for now—Tim leaves again Sunday.”
“Damn. Think you’ll go crazy again?”
“I might, but not as bad. I promise. Meantime, we decorated our tree and I’ve started the baking. I’m back on track.”
“You scared me, you know. I thought you were in trouble. This didn’t seem like your normal mood swing.”
“I know. But I’m fine.” She sounded happy. Too happy. She sounded idiotic. “I’m over my crisis. I’m upset and angry like everyone. But I’m not over the edge anymore.”
“So basically, orgasms cured your breakdown?”
“Maybe. At least, they didn’t hurt.”
“What a staggering concept. Think of the implications for patients at the Institute. Instead of group therapy, we’ll hold orgies. Instead of drugs, we’ll prescribe sex.”
She laughed. “It’s worth a try. But I don’t know if it’s a cure. I still get nightmares; I just don’t react the same way. I had this dream last night where I’m in court and next to me is a blonde. Just the blonde part—her head, on the chair, staring at me. She’s got blood around her neck, and it’s oozing into a puddle on the chair.”
“Okay.”
“I’m defending the guy who decapitated her, so she’s angry. She wants me to feel sorry for her so I’ll slip up and let him hang. But, instead, I start making all sorts of puns. To the jury. Stupid puns. About not losing our heads, remaining detached when considering the body of evidence, not getting ahead of ourselves, and minding the rules of law. The closing is uproariously funny to me, hilarious. The jury, the judge, and the defendant are all in hysterics. I win the case. And I wake up laughing out loud.”
A chapped spot on my lips throbbed. I chewed it, tasted blood. “Hell of a dream,” I said. “Think it was about the nannies? You’re worried you’ll have to defend the creep?”
“I just think it means I’m feeling confident again, not intimidated by doubts.” The dream sounded grisly, but Susan was obviously amused by it. Even motivated. She sounded almost like herself again. I took out a charcoal cashmere, a black patterned handknit, and the purple cowlneck. Why couldn’t I decide?
“God, the gymnastics moms must think I’m a lunatic,” Susan went on. “I think I scared them.”
“I’d say so, yes. But you woke them up.”
“Think they all ran out to buy guns today?”
“More likely, they’re all at South Street Karate.”
She laughed at the thought. “Leslie the Black Belt.” Leslie was bone thin and barely five feet tall. “Seriously, though, we should follow up. Organize. Form a town watch. Set up that buddy system. And quickly.”
Susan did sound better. I smirked, imagining Tim healing her with his potency.