that contagious?” Jennifer teased with a laugh, grabbing a few cookies.
Tim, being a fairly literal guy, got perplexed. “No.”
“She was joking,” I cut in quickly.
Tim forced a polite laugh and slapped his leg so hard it was going to leave a bruise. His socialization was going terribly well…
“I shall rephrase,” Tim announced, glancing over at me for approval.
I nodded and smiled.
“I have a guess,” he said shakily.
I held my breath and waited to be horrified. Tim had already proven that he was capable of saying anything.
“Go for it,” Jennifer said, slugging back her entire glass of wine then going for more.
“Did she drive?” I asked June quietly as she sat down next to me.
“Oh, heavens no,” June said with a giggle. “I did. I’ll get her home safely.”
“A killer with two butts is an assassin,” Tim revealed, to a delighted whoop from Jennifer.
“Yes! Get it everyone? Ass-ass-in… assassin! Two asses!” she shouted, impressed with Tim’s useless knowledge. “Not to worry. I have more.”
“Of course, you do,” Heather said.
Heather and Missy sat on the couch together, bodies close. It made me happy to think they were getting back together. From what I’d surmised, it was Missy’s hellfire and brimstone religious upbringing that had put a kink in their relationship last year. I didn’t know what had changed, but I knew in my heart they were happier together than apart.
“Look at that,” Steve whispered in my ear. “What the heck is Birdie doing?”
It was a good question. What the heck was Birdie doing?
Up till a few minutes ago, Birdie had been behaving herself beautifully which was shocking. She had perched on the couch next to Missy and watched the action with glee. She’d only flipped me off a few times and hadn’t called me a hooker once. However, now she seemed obsessed with Missy. She’d wedged herself between Heather and my childhood BFF and was stroking her hair and peppering her face with ghostly kisses.
“Do you think Birdie was a lesbian hooker?” Steve asked.
Swallowing back my laugh was hard but doable. Since answering Steve was a no-no, I simply shrugged my shoulders and watched the show unfold. Birdie’s behavior wasn’t of a sexual nature. It was loving.
Was there a chance Birdie had known Missy in life? Was Birdie a relative of my friend? I didn’t think so. I’d known Missy since we were small, but it was a possibility if Birdie’s actions were anything to go by.
“How about we throw some facts out and whoever has the best or grossest info wins,” Jennifer suggested.
“You’ve already won,” June told Jennifer. “You’re a font of unappetizing information, my dear.”
Jennifer stood up and took a bow. “Thank you, June.”
“It wasn’t a compliment,” Heather said, grinning. “It was a polite way of saying you only have one oar in the water.”
“I meant it in a loving way,” June said with a giggle. “Jennifer lights up my life and fills my head with nonsense. That’s what friends are for.”
“Damn straight,” Jennifer announced as she popped open another bottle of wine. “Who wants to take me on?”
“I’m out,” I said. “There’s no way I can beat you.”
“Count me out too,” Missy said, unaware that she was being adored by a dead woman.
Heather, who was not unaware of Birdie’s obsession with Missy, glanced over at me to check if I’d observed what was going on. I nodded covertly and shrugged. The Ouija board was definitely going to be put to use this evening. There was far more to Birdie than just an active middle finger and a foul mouth.
“I’ll just listen,” June said, pushing her wine away and sipping on lemonade instead. “I might learn something new that will make Charlie laugh.”
“Is he back from his business trip yet?” Missy inquired.
“Tonight,” June told her. “It’s been two long weeks without my guy. I miss him.”
“Tonight?” I asked, surprised. It was news to me. Gideon hadn’t said when they would return, just that they would. Maybe Charlie was coming back first.
“Yes,” June said with a giggle and a blush. “I’m going to go home and get gussied up in a bit.”
June’s blush made me grin. She was fifty-seven and blissfully married to a man who she had no clue was older than time. They were a fine example of marriage goals. June was the only one of us who had been successful in the relationship department. However, the rest of us were working on it. Jennifer, sixty-five and five times divorced, had a good thing going with Sherriff Dip Doody.