a virgin. We haven’t had sex, okay?”
I frowned. “You haven’t?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
Ashley laughed. “Have you ever considered Earl might be a gentleman?”
This time I snorted. I couldn’t help it.
“Emily!”
“What? I’m sorry. A gentleman doesn’t make a deal to protect one woman, while he has every intention of taking her friend for sex.”
“We haven’t had sex and he has been so nice to me. I can’t even begin to tell you how … he is. I think he’s sweet.”
“Honey, that’s Stockholm syndrome talking.”
“I thought that, but Emily, he’s … he makes sure I’m happy. Yeah, I mean, at first, it wasn’t easy and it has only been a couple of days, and he was a dick and he can be a pain in the ass, but, I … I think I kind of like him.”
“Kind of like him?” This was a huge fucking deal. I mean, I don’t even know how she could be thinking in terms of liking this asshole. He was only interested in getting a virgin.
Ashley shrugged. “I know it makes me sound like a pushover.”
“You sound like you’re protecting him.”
“Maybe I am. He hasn’t been bad to me, Em. I’m not an idiot. I know what he’s all about. He’s told me, but he’s not the worst monster we’ve seen, is he?”
I paused.
“Your dad. He killed my mom and well, look at the mess he got us all into. I’d say he was our biggest problem.”
I didn’t want to admit that she was right, but she really was. My dad was a grade-A selfish asshole. If it wasn’t for my men, we’d have both been dead, and the life we had together wouldn’t have happened.
“I felt so guilty,” I said. “They bargained your life for mine. I couldn’t stand it.”
Ashley cupped my cheek. “You know, in high school, I could see how devoted they were to you. I guess nothing ever changes.”
I put my hand over hers. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“You’re not going to lose me. I’m right here.”
I couldn’t help but pull her into me for another hug. I hated the way I felt. The guilt was still there. Ashley held me and I closed my eyes, hoping she was happy.
“Please tell me you’re happy.”
“Don’t push it,” Ashley said, laughing. “I know there are a lot of things in this life I was never going to get.”
“The cooking show?” I asked.
“Just, I don’t know. I think I pictured a life with a husband who adored me, and we’d have kids, a house, and a couple of dogs, cats as well. You know I’m crazy about animals.”
I chuckled. With us both working, we hadn’t been able to get a dog.
She sighed.
“Well, could Earl be the love of your life?”
Ashley shook her head. “I’d like to think there’s a chance, you know, but he’s made it abundantly clear he and I, we’re not going to … he wants one thing from me. When he’s ready, he’ll get it, and take me until he’s bored.”
Now I felt sick, angered, and wanted to kill the bastard. I stood up, ready to do just that, but again, Ashley caught my wrist.
“How about we stop talking about my men and we talk about all of yours,” Ashley said with a laugh.
“There are not that many.”
“Has Drake joined your harem?”
“It’s not a harem and ew, no, gross. Drake is … he’s my guard, I think. And I believe we’re also friends. I think so.”
“You only think so?”
“You know how it is.” I rubbed at my temple.
“I know how it was in high school. Clearly not a whole lot changed.”
I stared at Ashley. Her smile. It didn’t quite meet her eyes, and I hated myself for that. She was the optimist between us. The kind of woman to watch a romance film and wish she could find her Mr. Right. Earl wasn’t it. If he only wanted her virginity, then I knew without a doubt she was only heading for heartbreak, and looking at her now, with my understanding of Ashley, she knew it too.
I took her hand. “You can always come back here. You got me.”
Ashley squeezed my hands. “I know. I’m not afraid.”
“You’ve got nothing to be afraid of,” Earl said, startling us.
Caleb, Vadik, Gael, and River were by his side. I hadn’t even seen them come in.
I stood with Ashley, holding her hand.
“Dinner is served.”
I tried to read them, to see if I had any idea what had gone down. Nothing.
Gritting my teeth, I stared at all of them.
“I’d like