leaned forward, his arms resting on his knees. “Then get to know me. Let’s start over.”
“I don’t want to start over. I want to move on.”
“Carson—”
“Listen to me.” I held up my hand to silence him. “Look, I understand where you’re coming from, why you did what you did. It’s a reasonable thing to do, to hide your money to make sure you fall for someone who falls for you and not the wealth attached to your name. I don’t think you’re a bad person because of it. But I’m still so fragile.” I had to pause to take a breath, to digest the pain I suddenly felt, to let the water in my eyes disappear again. “I’m still broken. When I was married, I loved my husband with everything I had, and it’s not just his infidelity that hurts, but all the lies…the lies to my face. Charlie encouraged me out of my comfort zone when I knew I wasn’t ready. I’m too sensitive to handle this, to bounce back like nothing happened. If I’m going to be in a relationship with someone, it has to be based on a foundation of complete honesty. No surprises. I want to forgive you and just move on, but that’s not me, not in my current state. I’m sorry, but it’s not going to happen…and there’s nothing you can do to change that.”
He bowed his head and looked at his hands, his shoulders sagging with defeat.
I wasn’t sure if I should just get up and leave…or proceed with the interview. The room was filled with so many of our emotions.
He cleared his throat. “I shouldn’t have rushed things with you. I should have just left them alone. I should have been patient.” He raised his head and looked at me. “I was selfish because I wanted you, and I took this relationship in a direction you weren’t ready for, without being honest about who I was.” He shook his head. “I see that now…and I’m sorry.”
Now it was hard to look at him because I could feel his pain, his regret. I was pretty astute at reading people, and I could read him so clearly. It didn’t matter that his face was still blank, because I could feel the pain radiating from his soul. It filled the room, changed the energy. “We can still be friends.”
He lifted his chin and looked at me, his hands together, his body still leaning forward. He stared at me for a long time, his eyes slightly shifting back and forth. “I thought you had enough friends?” He smiled slightly, forced it to stretch across his lips, but no amount of force could make it reach his eyes.
I remembered the words I’d said to him at the bar, the cold reaction I gave that resulted in him putting me in my place. He was the one hurt in that moment, but he tried to lighten the mood, because he accepted my answer. The conversation was finally over. He would stop trying. It was done. “I can make room for one more.”
Three
Dax
I was just about to leave the office when Renee walked inside.
“I’m going to head out.” I placed my laptop inside my satchel then placed the strap over my shoulder. “You want a ride?”
“Your driver doesn’t mind?”
“He’s paid too much to mind.” I walked out of the office with her by my side. We entered the elevator and hit the button to the lobby.
She kept glancing at me.
“What?” I could see her blurry reflection in the steel doors, see her turn to look at me.
“How did your interview go?”
It didn’t go the way I wanted, but I’d accepted the results. “It’s not going to happen.”
“Really?” she asked in surprise. “She really can’t forgive you?”
“No. But it’s fine…I understand.”
“I think she’s being unreasonable—”
“Really, it’s okay.” The doors opened, and I let her step out first.
“How is it okay?” she asked. “I thought you really liked her.”
“I do. But it’s just not meant to be. She wasn’t ready for a relationship in the first place, and I kinda steered her into it. I was selfish. I see that now.”
“Wanting to be with someone isn’t selfish, Dax.”
“It is when you aren’t honest about who you are.” I walked through the double doors to the car waiting for me. I opened the back door for her. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore, Renee. Let’s just move on.”
She looked at me before she lowered herself into the car, like she