totally says the wrong thing sometimes. The girl with the beautiful smile.”
I look at my closet, stuffed with expensive new clothes. “You’re not into the new… me?”
“Come on—you look great. Really great. That’s not the point. The Magnolia League is changing you. That’s what it does, Alex, and that’s why I wanted you to help me get Hayes out of it. But it looks like you’ve drunk the Kool-Aid.”
“What about Madison?”
“What about her?”
“Why do you talk to her so much? You guys are always off whispering and talking to each other on the phone. If you’re so over her, what’s the deal?”
Thaddeus sighs. “Look, I wish I could tell you, but I can’t. I promised I wouldn’t.”
“Convenient.”
“I can tell you that it’s not what you think, though—whatever the hell you’re thinking. Because if you knew, you wouldn’t be jealous at all. Not that that’s even the point.”
“And what is the point?”
“You promised me you wouldn’t do this. And then you turned around and did exactly what I asked you not to. How am I supposed to trust you again?”
He picks up the John the Conqueror root from the floor.
“It’s just that I got really burned by my last relationship, Thaddeus. I mean, Reggie cheated on me.”
“I know.” He shakes his head.
“I wasn’t thinking straight. I’m sorry, Thaddeus.”
“I am too.”
“What are you apologizing for?” I ask, putting my head on his shoulder.
Thaddeus shakes me off and stands. “Because I can’t go to the ball with you.”
“What?”
“I can’t trust you, Alex.”
“Thaddeus, I said I was sor—”
He shakes his head. “It’s too late.”
My stomach starts to curdle as I feel the cold fingers of panic set in. “Come on.”
“Look, I feel really bad about this. I never should have gotten involved with you in the first place. I knew this magic bullshit would get in the way eventually. That’s the thing about it, isn’t it? If you can have anything, how do you know what’s real?”
“How we feel about each other is real.”
“Is it?” Thaddeus asks, exasperated. “Or did you just slip some love potion into my sweet tea?”
“Thaddeus—”
“I’ll see you around.”
And with that, the guy of my dreams puts the champagne on the bureau and exits, leaving me alone with my mother’s beautiful dress and the unused spell that ruined everything.
31
Well, my grandmother was right. It’s the Magnolia League Christmas Ball, and everyone in Savannah is here.
Josie drives me to the Oglethorpe-Williams House, where the ball is always held. I look out the window, trying to stay far enough behind the tinted glass so that the crowd filing in won’t see me as we cruise past the front porch. I was supposed to arrive with Hayes and Madison, but after Thaddeus ditched me, I texted them to say I’d rather get ready solo. Josie parks at the back of the house, near the kitchen entrance. Magnolia girls who are being presented go in through the back so no one will see them before they make their entrance down the grand staircase in the front hall. For months my grandmother has been telling me, “In through the kitchen, out through the hall,” as if it’s some kind of magic charm.
“Going in?” Josie asks.
“I guess.”
“You look very pretty,” she says kindly.
I shrug.
There’s a loud pop, and I jump at the sound. Josie hands me the warm bottle of champagne that I was supposed to enjoy with Thaddeus.
“It’s not cold, but it’ll do,” she says. “Drink yourself some liquid courage.”
I take it from her and slug back a gulp.
“I heard you and your boyfriend talking about that root magic,” she says. “He’s right. It’s no good for love. You got to do love on your own.”
“Okay.”
“Okay? What does okay mean? Miss Alex, you listen to me. The Buzzards never use their own magic—other than some beauty tricks. What does that say to you? They sell their mojos and their roots all day and all night, but they don’t ever bite off any for themselves.”
“So what?”
“You ask yourself, who’s stronger? The Buzzards or the Magnolias? One knows the spells; the other can’t get along without them. The cleverest ladies I know, they’ll use a little pinch here and there, but they make sure those pinches are spread out. Like your grandmother. She knows how to conjure, but she thinks twice before doing it.”
“Well, thanks for the too-late advice,” I say, handing the half-empty bottle to Josie. “Okay. Here I go.” I open the car door and lurch onto the sidewalk, my head spinning. I don’t mean