most of the time. I had grown rather fond of wood-fired pizza over the past year, but breakfast and lunch, I prepared myself.
Pushing open the rustic western style saloon doors, I lead her into the lounge room, slowing down enough for her to get a glimpse of the enormous floor to ceiling fireplace. The huge painting of the brumby mob I had done from a photo I took of them years ago. My family’s photos adorned the walls and tabletops, my brothers and myself in various stages of life, our mum, and plenty of Daxx and Onyxx. The only person missing was my father. Having photos of him out seemed like an insult to Mack and the kids. Noxx lost years of his marriage because of Dad, missed out on Daxx’s birth, so photos of Dad didn’t belong amongst the happiness of the family; instead, I moved them into my office. I used that room minimally, so there was no risk of me getting pissed off by looking at them too often.
Passing the overstuffed and extremely comfortable white couch, I made a mental note to make love to Farron on it one night when it was cold enough to light up the fireplace for mood lighting. Now, however, we were going to have our first time in my bed, specifically because I wanted the image in my head of her spread out in it, her short, fluffy hair on my pillow and her scent all over my sheets.
Silently, we made our way down the hall, my bedroom being at the end, stopping at the open door, I looked down at Farron.
“Baby, this still something you want?” I asked, hating the fact that I was giving her an out but knew it was the best thing for her trust in me. Waiting longer to make love to her would be hard, but I would be happy to do it as long as she was still with me.
Farron looked inside my bedroom, seeing the large bed in the middle of the room covered in a deep, forest-green doona cover with black, satin trimming around the edges. Black, satin pillows finished the simple and elegant setting. My furniture consisted of a dark wood chest of drawers, a rocking chair in the corner and a small nest of tables for more family photos. The room was plain compared to the rest of the house, no idea why other than by the time I finished redecorating the black and blue mess from Noxx, I lost the will to add anything more to my room.
Farron tightened her fingers around mine, I could feel the sweat coating my palm and my concern that she wanted to give this a miss returned.
“Farron?”
“What if … what if I … disappoint you?” she whispered, her eyes still glued to the king-size bed dwarfing the room.
“I know, I know you don’t want to hear that kind of talk from me,” she rushed to say before I had a chance to stop her, “but just hear me out okay.”
“Fine, say what you need to, but be warned I won’t stand for you putting yourself down. Got it?” I muttered, giving her hand a warning squeeze.
“Yes, I am over most of the shit he said and put me through, but … I have some lingering … issues,” she hedged, “about certain parts of my body.” She finished with a flourishing sweep of one hand directed at her torso.
“I mean I have had a child, and when you do that, you tend to develop stretching, which results in red … marks over one’s stomach area. My breasts also have … let’s say increased and changed shape.”
Biting the inside of my cheek to stop myself from laughing while she itemised her body issues, and to be honest, I was amused, I motioned for her to continue.
“My vagina, while normal on the outside, I keep the hair down there to a minimum, but on the inside, I have no idea of the condition. Dillion was a vaginal birth, and he had a large head and mighty big shoulders. Think Stewie from the Family guy, a head so big the Guinness Book of Records could have been interested.”
“I don’t know how the tightness is now on the tight scale, but yeah, I just … wanted you to … you know, be aware of things down … down there.”
I couldn’t help it, the look on her face and the crazy shit she just said, and the way she