here.” I had been using my camp name for so many years, and had developed such a good reputation around the place, that normally it was a point of pride. I was the semi-legendary Blackbird, the ragtag little city kid who had blossomed into a trail-guiding, scat-identifying swan. But alone in my dorm room it sounded a little goofy, like a kid playing spy.
“Hey, kiddo! Good to hear from you. I just found a sweatshirt you left here. Pretty nice hoodie. Want me to mail it to you?”
His face appeared in my mind’s eye with an expression to match his voice: warm brown eyes and easygoing, energetic smile, shaggy dark hair brushing his shoulders. He shaved maybe every couple of weeks, and then with haste and indifference. I smiled and tugged the phone closer to my wooden desk chair. “Sure. I was wondering where it went. Thought maybe I left it behind at Cade’s friend’s place.”
“I’ll send it out on Monday. How’s the semester treating you?” His dog began to bark, and he made a noise to shush her. “How was October?”
“I made it through okay. Kept busy.”
“You think about your mom a lot?”
“Yeah, but I tried not to dwell on it. It’s been three years now. I need to keep moving forward. One day at a time, and all that.” I shut off the TV. “I finally got to meet a member of Cade’s family today. His brother. He just got back from Afghanistan.”
“All this time and you still haven’t met any of them?”
“Nope. They live pretty far away, you know. I think he finds them embarrassing. He says they’re nothing like him.”
Dave laughed ruefully. “We all think that about ourselves. Never as true as we want to believe.”
“His brother seemed fine. I’d been sending him all these care packages with snack food and Little Debbie cakes and stuff like that, and he thanked me for them. It has to be overwhelming when you first get home after three years, so I thought that was sweet that he remembered.”
“Gonna be a hell of an adjustment, I’m sure. I remember those days.”
I frowned and slouched lower in my chair. “I thought you got kicked out of Ranger school.”
“I did, but then 9/11 happened and they sent me to Afghanistan anyway. Coming back wasn’t much of a party. Why do you think I ended up living in the woods?”
“I never heard you talk about that.”
“Nope. One day at a time, right? Keep moving forward.”
I twisted the cord around my fingers, a strange cat’s cradle. “No fair using AA lingo against me.”
“Go easy on the guy, that’s all I’m saying. Around the holidays is the worst time to come back, with everybody wanting you to be all cheery when you’re not feeling it at all. What was he, a grunt?”
“Yeah. Infantry. He did roadside patrols and things like that. He got a Purple Heart for a leg wound a couple years ago—something exploded in a car that was driving up to them, or something like that.”
Dave gave a low whistle. “Get that guy into therapy, stat. I’m not joking.”
“Oh, he’s just a normal soldier. There must have been a hundred other soldiers who got off that plane with him. I’m sure they don’t all need therapy.” I let my voice slide back into a less serious register. “Be breezy, Dave.”
At the razzing sound he made, I broke into a grin. “The wisdom of Kendra,” he said. “Words to live by. So, hey—are you coming down here again for Christmas this year? Easier if you tell me in advance instead of just showing up.”
“Not this time. I’m going to New Hampshire. Embarrassing or no, Cade can’t escape it this year.”
“That sounds like a threat.”
I laughed, but there was an edge to it. “You know what, Dave—I need to get through to him that even if his family is a little crazy, at least he’s got one. When I was a kid, I envied the kids who had aunts and uncles and big noisy households. And these people live in a big old farmhouse in the country with three generations in it. It sounds great to me. I think he just doesn’t appreciate it.”
“Or maybe they really are nuts. Maybe he’s the only sane one of the bunch.”
“I doubt that. This is Cade we’re talking about. To him, everything’s got to be on a grand scale. I hate to say it, but he’s a drama queen.”
“Well, you’ll find out.”
I smiled. “Yes. I will. Finally.”
He