life without ripping our hair out and retreating into our rooms to draw pretty pictures with non-toxic crayons. You're not special. You're just as screwed up as the rest of us. Welcome to life. Once you let go of your delusions of perfection, you'll be a hell of a lot happier. I know that everyone around you will be a lot happier."
"My parents aren't a mess."
His statement was pure instinct but after the words left his mouth he had to wonder if they were even true. When he was younger, he would have said that they were.
"Naw, they're just better at hiding it than most people. Just like you are. Do you honestly think that they didn't doubt themselves when they were younger and raising two kids? I bet they did, but they didn't want you or anyone else to know. They probably lost a night or two of sleep wondering if they were making the right decisions."
"I can't even imagine it."
"Can't you? Really? Do you honestly believe that your parents just know what they do is right and never have any doubt at all?"
It did sound rather far-fetched. Humans had doubts.
"I guess I've just never seen it."
"Because they didn't want you to. Especially when we're young, our parents want us to think that they know everything and can fix everything. It's when we become adults that we realize that our parents aren't perfect. But we love them anyway. Assuming, of course, that they haven't been abusive or anything. I'm talking regular, run of the mill parental units here."
Ryan had never considered his parents run of the mill or ordinary. To him they had always been almost superhuman, definitely above average. The fact that they made him crazy didn't change that.
"I do love my parents. They can just get under my skin."
"Because they don't act the way you want them to."
He was too ashamed to agree out loud, but Mariah had to know that she'd spoken the truth.
"You wanted them to be different," she continued on. "You wanted them to be huggy, emotional parents that made brownies and helped you build blanket forts."
"I didn't even know what a blanket fort was until you told me. I think I was thirteen or fourteen at the time."
"That's not child abuse, Ryan. They loved you." She stepped back and her gaze swept around the room. "Look at your bedroom. It's a shrine to your childhood. They haven't changed a thing. Not one thing. It's like a time capsule here. Do you think they didn't change it because they're lazy or didn't have the cash to redecorate? No, they did it because they love you. They love you and I bet they think about your childhood a lot. I bet when they're alone they reminisce about funny stuff that you and Liza did when you were little. It's just not their way to do that out in the open. I know you want it to be different, but you need to accept them as they are."
"They don't accept me," Ryan shot back. He remembered too many arguments with his mom and dad about him becoming a cop. "They hate my job."
"Are you doing your job to get your parents' approval or are you doing it for you?"
"For me."
"Then it doesn't matter, does it? If you're not going to change your job then the whole conversation is moot. Yet, you still let them get you all wound up about it. Ryan, they don't expect you to change your career. When was the last time they bugged out about joining the family business? How long has it been?"
Years. He couldn't really remember the exact time.
"A while ago. But they weren't thrilled about my latest job change," he protested. "They weren't happy about that."
"They were just disappointed. They'd hoped you would come home if you took a new job." She moved right in front of him, and he could smell the teasing scent of her perfume. They were close enough that he could feel the heat from her body penetrating the thin cotton of his shirt. "I was disappointed that you didn't come home."
That hit him in the chest - right in the spot where his heart resided. He'd thought about her so many times even when he hadn't wanted to. That she had thought about him too made him...glad.
"Chicago isn't home anymore," he admitted honestly. "But I did think about you, Mariah. More than I should have."
He'd gotten blind drunk the night of her wedding. He'd