have no idea," she confessed with an uncomfortable laugh. "I'm not sure that I'm convinced that he's still carrying a torch. He doesn't seem the type."
"Keep your eyes open when you're with him. I can give you some body language advice if you'd like it."
Mariah wasn't sure she wanted it. She wasn't sure she wanted to do anything about Ryan. Or their relationship.
Because if Ryan still had feelings...and she had feelings...then what in the hell were they going to do about it? She didn't want to go after something that was destined to fall apart anyway.
Was Ryan best left in the past? Or did they deserve a second chance?
She didn't have any answers, but one thing was certain. She didn't want a second heartbreak at the hands of Ryan Beck. She'd barely survived the first one.
17
After finishing up with Trent, Ryan headed back to his apartment. He'd received a message from the office that they had information for him, and he wanted a chance to sit down where it was quiet and review it all. He only had Isla left to talk to and she was being difficult, being vague about when they could meet. Stepping out of his cab in front of his building, he was greeted with a sight that he didn't like at all. A rush of emotion punched at his gut, almost taking his breath away.
Mariah. And another man. Hugging on the sidewalk. She looked happy.
Why am I so angry that she's happy? I should want her to be happy.
And I'm not angry. I'm just surprised.
Happy, but not that happy.
This - feeling - wasn't welcome. He didn't have any business being jealous of Mariah in the arms of a man. He didn't want to be jealous either. It wasn't convenient in the least. He was still working on trying to be friends with her, and now he wanted to knock that guy into the street and let a bus run over him.
He must have been standing there staring because eventually she noticed him, giving him a cheery wave as she bid the man goodbye. She stood on the sidewalk as he drove away before turning back to Ryan, who still hadn't been able to move from his spot.
Just like that. In a mere split second more than a decade had melted away and he was twenty-two again. Life hadn't seemed nearly as difficult or complex. Twelve years ago he would have strode up to Mariah and pulled her into his arms, kissing her senseless.
Today? He wasn't going to do that. He was going to remember that they weren't a couple anymore. That he'd moved on.
Funny, I don't feel like I've moved on, though. Is this why I didn't want to see her?
It was like being hit on the head with a clue-by-four. He'd wanted to avoid Mariah because his emotions when it came to her were messy. They'd separated mutually back then but he'd never found anyone that made him feel the way she had.
And it appeared that she still could. Shit, this was not good. Clearly, she'd moved on. Married, divorced, and now dating someone. She wasn't losing any goddamn sleep over him.
Now he was even more pissed off.
"Who was that?"
Christ on a cracker, could he be any more obvious about his jealousy? He needed to keep his mouth shut but for some reason that was proving more difficult than usual.
"A friend of mine. We had lunch."
He held the door open for her and they entered the much cooler lobby.
"A friend? Or a boyfriend?"
He wanted to slam his head into the wall but instead he simply pushed the button to call the elevator.
I am such an idiot.
Mariah didn't appear perturbed about his intrusive questions, which only served to piss him off more.
"It was a date. If that's what you're asking."
"I wasn't asking anything."
"It sounded like you were asking if he was my boyfriend."
"Why would I ask that?"
The doors slid open and they stepped into the elevator. Ryan tugged at his collar, wishing he were just about anywhere but here.
"I don't know. How about we change the subject? What time are we leaving for dinner?"
Ryan had completely forgotten that they were supposed to go to dinner with his parents that night. Together. Like they were a couple.
"You don't have to go."
Shit, that sounded rude. He hadn't meant it to come out like that. He'd just wanted to give her an out. His parents had put her on the spot yesterday.
"Why would I not go? I told