among themselves, stealing glances at the two men.
“Our guests have arrived,” Gorrutvia announces to the group. She gestures to me. “This is Kora, mated to Turan Butarza, captain. And these two strapping young men are Geddion and Rojan. Geddion is a made vostrat, and Rojan is having his ceremony to be made tonight. For any who aren’t aware, these three just got back from a successful mission to capture Rizban Gordulla.”
Everyone cheers at the mention of Rizban’s capture. I stand there awkwardly, unsure how to act. Then they all come up and start introducing themselves. I feel awkward to be unexpectedly meeting all these new people, but they treat me with tremendous respect, a status apparently accorded to me as Turan’s mate. Geddion and Rojan both get busy making conversation with the women, who clearly consider their status as made members to be something extremely desirable.
“Last time I saw Turan, he didn’t have a mate,” says an older man, approaching me with his wife. He smiles jovially. “When did you two get together?”
I turn to face them. “I uh… it was recent.”
“You sure found yourself a good one,” says the woman, winking. “You should have seen the attention Turan would get whenever he used to show up at an event like this. I’ll bet it feels pretty good to walk out here wearing his mark.”
“I guess,” I mumble, blushing.
The man laughs, giving his mate playful little tap on her behind. “I think I have a pretty good idea who you’d be after if you weren’t Fated to me.”
She puts on a mock innocent voice. “Who, me? Darling, you know I only have eyes for you.”
I fake a laugh, feeling uncomfortable. The truth is, I’m not really in the mood to be social. I’m still feeling shitty because of the way things have been with Turan, and being around all these people who apparently view our relationship as some lucky, perfect thing, is draining.
The couple moves on, and to my relief, I manage to buy myself a break from conversation by going over to the buffet and taking an extra long time to dish up my plate. I watch out of the corner of my eye as a pretty young woman takes Rojan’s hand and leads him over to a table away from the rest of the group, looking pleased with herself. Rojan sits down with her, obviously attracted. Good for him, I guess. I’m glad he’s having a good time.
Gorrutvia makes eye contact with me, perhaps seeing that I’m not having a good time. I look away, not wanting to encourage a conversation. It’s not that I’m trying to be rude, I’m just not in the right head space. I take my plate and head across the patio back to the mansion, having to stop multiple times as different people try to suck me into conversation.
I breathe a sigh of relief as I reenter the mansion, find a chair near a window, and begin to eat my meal in peace.
Geddion pops his head in. “Kora, everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I tell him, gritting my teeth. “Just not feeling very social.”
He nods and returns to the group of fawning Vostra women. I pick at my food, thinking about things with Turan. Obviously he knows that something is amiss between us, but it doesn’t seem like he knows how to address it any better than I do. And now that he’s so occupied with Family business, I’m not even sure he has time to think about it.
I try to clear my head. It’s hard to even fully describe what I’m so upset about. The thing that originally set me off was the incident when we captured Rizban, but I’m pretty sure the way I’m feeling right now is about more than that. In a more general way, I want to feel that Turan respects me. That he trusts me. The fact that he didn’t even think it was important to tell me about his plan indicates that he does neither. On top of that, I’m in a new environment outside of my control, and feeling fairly overwhelmed by all the changes my life has gone through recently. I wish I had some kind of past relationship experience to draw on. Maybe then I would know what to do.
I’m in such an irritable mood that I end up snapping as yet another person comes to interrupt my thoughts.
“Okay, seriously! Can you leave me alone?”
Turan
I head out of the comm room with Metturion, grimly