my head, surprised to see Paisley standing there.
How long have I been staring into my drink?
Unable to see the pity on her face, I turn away, downing more of my drink. I can’t handle more today. She’s hurt and has every right to be angry. She can only see that a girl she befriended took advantage of her kindness.
And if I hadn’t lost my mum, I would let her take her rightful anger out on me. But right now, I just want to be left alone. I can’t bear any more.
The chair beside me scrapes across the wooden flooring and I hear her take a seat next to me. Tension swirls in the air and I bite my lip, keeping in the sob threatening to escape.
“I didn’t say you could sit there,” Rebecca grits out.
“I know you must hate me right now, and you have every right to. I slapped her, and at the time, it felt justified. I didn’t know the entire truth. But now, I’d like to. But not from you; from Evie.”
“Please go,” I beg, tears gathering in my eyes. “You have nothing to be sorry for, and I don’t need your pity.”
“Yes, I do,” she tells me, as Landon steps up to the back of her chair, squeezing her shoulder. “I reacted out of instinct without hearing you out. This isn’t pity, this is guilt.”
Her kindness is my undoing. I don’t deserve it, haven’t earned it, and yet she’s sitting next to me, her eyes pleading with mine to forgive her.
In a blubbering mess, I blurt out everything inside of me. “I’m so sorry for what I’ve done to you and your family. If I could turn back time, I would. I’d do it all differently. I never, not for a second, wanted to hurt anyone. I promise. You have to believe me. Even before the fire, before I got close to Wyatt, before I really knew any of you…” I shake my head, letting the tears fall, “I didn’t want to hurt anyone.”
She places her warm hand around my bicep. “Having calmed down, I know that. I should have from the start, but I could have lost my brothers. Reid got stabbed and I… it brought back nightmares from when I nearly lost Landon. When Wyatt told me his side of the story, I got angry and took it out on you. All I could feel was fear—fear that I could have lost my brothers, lost Reid.” She takes in a deep breath. “You could have told us he was your father.”
I force out a laugh, pitying her. She doesn’t get it. From everything Wyatt told me about their father, they had a great one. He was nothing like my sperm donor.
I try to focus on her when my vision begins to blur. “He is not my father. My longest interaction with him was when he hit me after stopping me seeing my mum. I hate him. He’s taken her from me,” I cry out.
“No, he hasn’t. After Rebecca shared that information, Landon and I started making some calls while we went to search for you. Landon’s uncle is a social worker, and he said he can help get the—”
“She’s dead,” I whisper hoarsely, and Paisley’s body jerks, a look of disbelief on her face. “She died five days ago, and no one bothered to tell me. She was alone when she died. I didn’t get to tell her I loved her. I didn’t get to hug her or hold her hand whilst she took her last breath.
“I’ve tried my hardest to make sure your family didn’t get hurt whilst trying to protect my own, and she died anyway. Her last few weeks were spent thinking I was poisoning her because of him. In the past couple of months, I was allowed to see her three times. I’ll never get that time back. Ever.” I inhale sharply before turning and looking at her dead in the eye, ignoring those listening around me. “I know you’re a good person, Paisley, one of the best, and you have every right to hate me. I deserve it. Yet you’re here, being kind to me. Right now, though, I need you to leave. It’s hurts too much to look at you; to be reminded of what I have lost.”
Her eyelids shut tightly before she opens them, letting me see the sorrow. “I’m so sorry. Please, let me make it—”
I push back from my chair, dizziness hitting so hard that