skull all night. "I've loved you a third of my life, and I think I've been in love with you for half that long. Don't say it back to me unless you mean it. You trust me with your body, and that's more than any man before me. But you don't trust me here yet." He pressed his hand to her chest and left it there. "Until you trust yourself, you'll never be able to love me." He swallowed. Hard. "I'll wait. I'm not going anywhere."
Pressing a palm to her forehead, she glanced away, gaze lost in thought. "We don't know if we can make this work, Noah. Neither of us has tried a relationship."
"We don't know it won't work. And we are trying, right now. We have been for weeks." The alternative was not having her at all, and he couldn't live through that. He'd lost everyone he ever cared about but her and Aubrey. He'd stop breathing if he lost either.
He could've wept when, instead of moving away or avoiding, she placed her hand over his on her chest. "How do you know I don't fully trust you? Or myself?"
Because she had to ask, that's why. "You know the moment I knew I was in love with you?" He stared into her eyes to ram home the difference. "When Max called to say you were being followed. My first thought as you walked toward me on the pier was I couldn't live without you." He'd rather that bastard kill him than harm one hair on her head. "If anything ever happens to me, you're the one I'd want raising Aubrey." That night he walked in on Raven and Aubrey's conversation about her burns made his chest ache to think about now.
Her eyes widened. "I don't know anything about parenting."
"You think I did at eighteen? No. You muddle through, for the best of the child. It's scary and hard and sometimes the only reward is an I love you at the end of the day." He sat up, her gaze tracking the move. "You don't trust that you can do the job. Be a parent, a mother. Whether it's Aubrey or your own someday." He slid his hands to her waist and pulled her closer. "I don't think you can. I know you can. That's trust. That's love."
Her pretty brown eyes filled again, tears clinging to her lashes and spilling down her cheeks. "You'd trust me with Aubrey?" She spoke so softly he barely heard her over his pounding heart.
"I already do."
She shook her head as if to deny his words, but then closed her eyes.
He pulled her sideways into his lap, hugging her hard. He got the sense she was trying to pull away from him, even though she didn't move, but he held tight. Raven didn't conform well to change and she hated being pushed, but he needed her to know how he felt. "I'm not asking for anything, baby. Just stay with me. The rest will come."
After long moments, when she didn't respond or flinch or cry, he had his answer. The knots of tension uncoiled in his gut and he flopped back on the bed with her sprawled over him. He'd never get tired of touching her. She was a damn balm to his soul. Running his hand up and down her back, he kissed her temple and started to doze off.
"Noah?"
"Hmm?"
She paused. "You're very comfortable."
A lazy grin split his face at her complicated statement wrapped in simple. She was staying.
***
While Noah slept, Raven dressed in jeans and a black turtleneck sweater and padded into the kitchen. Coffee brewing, she leaned against the counter and bit her lip.
Her head was woozy with everything he'd said but, oddly, she didn't feel trapped or pressured. Being with Noah was easy. Maybe too easy. Sometimes, she kept waiting for the other shoe to drop and for him to say he'd hit his emotional limit. After all, for his entire adult life, he'd had no one close to him to latch onto. There were security people and caretakers. And her. But he was used to being alone, depending on only himself.
Logically, he should be as wary as her. Instead, it was the opposite. He knew what he wanted and went for it with courage she wished she had. She didn't even know why she was like this. Her mother was a sweet, compassionate person who'd given Raven everything a little girl required. They didn't have a lot of money,