I felt like they were going to fall off.
"Well, no. I mean, I have, but I just really only ever had one goal."
"Not necessarily. It is important you know your options. Have your parents not discussed this with you? You can continue your education as well as gymnastics."
"No." My lips were turning numb. "My mom thinks this is just a hobby to pass time. And my dad is wrapped up in his business. Neither of them have brought up college."
He observed me quietly for a moment. "Your brother is in college, yes? How did that happen?"
"Yes, but no one talked to him about it, not that I can remember anyway. In my family, we don't even discuss college. It's just a given that you go. He's at the University of Florida. It's only like a three-hour drive from here. He basically went where his friends went."
Kova's forehead puckered and his mouth set in a hard line. "This is important for your career and something you should be aware of. Say you make a splash in the gym world and people start to recognize you. You make it to the World Championships or another international event and you place on the podium. From time to time, you will have the option to accept award money or endorsements. It is not a whole lot, but if you accept either one, you forfeit your eligibility to compete in college." He angled his body toward me. "It means you are going pro. But what happens if you go pro, and then, God forbid, you are injured before or after the Olympics? Your career as an Olympian is pretty much over. If you do not go pro, your career as a collegiate gymnast is not. I want you to be aware of that."
"But I want to go pro, Kova. I want to reach the highest level of this sport. I thought you understood that."
He shook his head. "You are misunderstanding me. I know what you want completely. I know it is to go to the Olympics, I just want you to think about college gymnastics too. You can still compete in college and go to the Olympics at the same time. It is accepting the prizes and endorsements that will change everything. Taking money means no collegiate gymnastics. Ever."
"So you are saying not to take prize money," I confirmed.
"I would never tell you what to do or what direction to take. I just want you to be informed. Some have regrets going pro while others say it changed their lives."
Kova's cell phone rang and he slipped it out of his pocket. A slight sneer pulled at his mouth before he declined the call and put it back. It had to be Katja.
I looked at the chunks of ice in front of me and mused over what Kova said, thankful he was taking the time to explain this. I'd forgotten I was in the tub while having this discussion, and the moment I looked down at the water a shiver ripped through me. I squeezed my toes. I wasn't aware of this caveat in the sport. My head was as misty as the frosty air elevating around me. If I accepted a prize, I couldn't compete in college…
But the real question was, did I want to compete in college?
I'd never given it a thought until now.
"Well, I clearly don't need the money, so I feel like it's an obvious choice."
He raised his index finger, indicating he wasn’t finished. "You would think that, but what if an agent comes along and wants to sign you? Says she will put you in commercials and billboard ads with other top gymnasts around the country?" he challenged. "What if she promises she can make you an abundant amount of money, where you will be able to support yourself within a year and even pay for college should you not be awarded a scholarship? Because surely you will want to support yourself eventually, yes?"
I chewed my lip. Okay. He had a point. And I was upset with myself for being so in the dark about it.
"Of course I want to support myself one day."
I stared at him, not knowing what I should do. Not relying on my parents would be a dream come true, and if I could build that from doing what I loved, the choice was obvious.
Kova threaded his fingers together. "You have a small period until the awards start coming in. I want you to use this time