welted butt cheeks, a light caress that nonetheless has me hissing between my teeth.
“Jesus Christ. I almost want you to piss me off again. That’s was great.”
The words stoke my anger to a raging wildfire, causing my stomach to clench with dread. He can’t be serious.
One at a time, Spider undoes my ankles. As soon as they’re free, he steps back.
“Stay there.” His footsteps scuff across the carpet.
Where in God’s name is he going? I lift my head and look over my shoulder in time to see him pick up the saddlebag and then disappear into the bathroom. Worry calls me to get to my feet before he comes back, to give myself some advantage, but my legs are like jelly and I can’t make my muscles move.
Water runs in the bathroom and I hear him scrub his hands. Spider returns a minute later carrying a squat white jar. Standing behind me, I hear the sound of him unscrewing the lid on the container. Then his fingers caress my backside, smoothing a thick, cool jell over the skin.
I wince at the burning flash of pain, but the jell quickly soothes the sting, leaving behind a tingling sensation. A whiff of something medicinal reaches my nose. Spider covers the welts on my rear with an almost loving care that, after his savagery, feels mocking.
He rubs the lotion in gently. Were the situation different, the care he’s taking would have made me feel cherished, even pampered, but I’m not fool enough to think I matter to him. He’s caring for his favorite toy again, polishing a jewel tarnished by his damage. I groan, feeling used and lost and wishing I could fade away.
He straightens and screws the lid back on the jar. I hear him return to the bathroom, and again, the water runs. When he comes back, he pulls me up to a sitting position. He turns my face up to his.
“Let this be a lesson to you.” He traces my lips with his thumb. “I’m not going to kill you, Wildcat. But I’m not letting you go, either. You belong to me, and that’s all there is to it, so settle in, because you’re in for one hell of a fucking ride.”
Those words should bring a measure of relief, and shock. He’s not going to kill me. Until now, he’d left that question unanswered, often taunting me with it. But the words are so full of ownership and arrogance that, after what he just did, all they do is send my loathing for him blazing. The affection I’m sure I hear in his voice leaves me feeling hollow and empty, gutted because of the futility of it. His indifference to the pain he’s caused—no, his outright enjoyment of it—strips me of all rationality, and there’s only the need to make him hurt.
I tear my face away, shoving to my feet. It’s the last straw.
“Get away from me!” I scream, shaking with fury. “Don’t you ever touch me again, you lowlife piece of shit! I don’t want you near me, I don’t want your hands on me. Just stay away from me.”
He chuckles, at my cursing, I think. I should hate myself for saying such things, but I can’t make myself care.
“Not gonna happen.” He touches me under the chin. “You’ll get used to me. After a while, you’ll come to need my touch again. Given enough time, you’ll come to love me.”
I jerk back, stunned. Love him? For real?
“No, Spider,” I grit out between my teeth, meeting his eyes with no difficulty at all. “You’re nothing but an animal. I may feel a lot of things for you, but I will never, ever love you.”
I expect—or maybe hope—for him to jerk back as if I’ve slapped him, for him to show some sign that I’ve hurt him. Instead, Spider smiles and strokes me under the chin, ignoring my livid glare.
“That changes nothing. I am your world now, Emma. I am all there is, and all there ever will be for you.”
His words make me feel hopeless and trapped. “No, you can’t—”
“I can, and I am. I’m keeping you, Wildcat. You want to spend your life hating me forever, you go right ahead, but forever is a long, long time.”
With a shrug, Spider turns and departs, leaving me alone with nothing but the stunned silence.
11
Rosie
My breath catches as I watch my Wildcat sleep.
Her gorgeous body, tanned golden brown by the desert sun, lies across the bed, tangled in the blankets and