bum knee and I’m pregnant, we hired help to get them all up along with lights decorating the outside of our house.
I think about his words from this morning and how different next year will look. Will we have Paw Patrol characters on our front lawn? Mickey Mouse? Snoopy?
Maybe all three.
Pepper lays near the tree, but when she spots us, her tail wags out of control as she gets up and races over to Luke. He chuckles, and I stare at the bottom of the tree.
This Christmas morning is different from my others as we start our own traditions together. I always went to my parents’ house and spent the day with them—which we’re doing, but they wanted us to have our own family Christmas mornings first, so we’re going over in the early evening to celebrate. Carol will be joining us, and Michelle has even said she might stop by so baby JJ can see some of his extended family on Christmas along with his Grammy Carol.
Jack is playing today, so he won’t be stopping by—another one of those life events that the guys on the field have to miss out on. While I want Luke to play if that’s what he wants, I’d hate for him to miss his son’s first Christmas. I think back to Nadine’s words of advice to Nicki at the bachelorette party that football careers are short and retirement is long, and I can’t help but wonder what Luke’s thinking as his knee gets stronger and stronger every day.
He hands me a box, and I unwrap it to find a canvas print from our wedding day. It’s a beautiful shot of us on the beach as the sun sets behind us, and despite everything that happened that day, it’s still a beautiful memory. It was the day he admitted he had real feelings for me even though we didn’t enter our marriage the traditional way.
He opens the matching daddy t-shirt and baby onesie I bought—the leprechaun from Lucky Charms for Luke, naturally, and a pot of gold for the baby.
We both open too many gifts from each other, from jewelry to books to electronics, and he hands me a small box last as we sit in the middle of a mound of wrapping paper that Pepper skips around happily in. I lift the lid off the box and find an envelope, and I pull out a stack of papers from it.
First is Luke’s amended will with me as his primary beneficiary.
Second is a business plan for Dalton Athlete Management along with an LLC by the same name.
Third is a piece of paper that simply says, “this is only the start” in Luke’s neat handwriting.
My brows draw together in confusion as I look up at him. “The start?” I ask.
He stretches out his knee. He bends it then straightens it again. It’s doing so much better even though he still has more therapy to get it back to playing shape. “I’ve had a lot of time to think over the last couple months,” he begins. “And I know what I want my future to look like.”
My brows rise in surprise.
“I never thought beyond the game, and not because it was bad luck but because there was nothing else I loved more. There was nothing I cared about more than playing. And then I met you. It’s as simple and as complicated as that. I want to be with you and with him.” He nods toward my stomach. “I haven’t even met him yet and I already love him more than whatever happens on the field. And if I could love someone that much before I even meet him, then I know I need to be around for all of it.”
“All of it?” I echo.
He nods. “I’m going to work my ass off to get healthy for you and for him, not to play. Even if Coach and the GM and Calvin get together and invite me to play again...the answer will be no. Because this is only the start of our life together, and I won’t let football or injuries or families or crazy exes or anything come between us. I’m retiring.”
“Wow,” I say softly, not sure what else to say as my heart thumps in my chest. “You’re...you’re giving up your career for me?”
He shakes his head. “For us. It’s not guaranteed anyway, and I’d rather go out on my terms than dick around for the next eight months with unknown answers. We don’t