still Shidan, only more primal, it doesn’t take away the basic man.”
“Sure,” Jolie agrees. “You’re right as far as you go. How are you going to make it across the desert? How are you going to track him? How are you going to handle running into a herd of bivo? A flight of sismis? A pack of guster? Or god—”
“Melchior can come with us,” I say.
“And how long before he loses it?” Jolie asks. “He’s been exposed. If he doesn’t lose it, then Addison will need him, because that would mean he’s immune. He could be the key to a cure in that case.”
“Sverre?” I ask, grasping at straws.
She doesn’t have to speak, the look on her face says it all. It’s the same situation. We can’t risk Sverre either, and he’s showing signs too. We can’t risk any of them. Jolie walks over and places her hands on my arms, squeezing.
“You know he can’t go either,” she says softly.
“Enough! I get it!” I yell, throwing my hands up in the air.
I want to punch something. Throw something. Anything but stay here in this damned apartment waiting for… what? I can’t answer that. Addison is working on a cure, but what if she doesn’t find one? What if she does, but it’s too late? There are too many what-ifs clogging my thoughts. No answers, only more worries.
“I get it,” Jolie says softly.
I’m sure she does, especially with Sverre showing signs of the illness too. Despite all our precautions, it is still spreading. Sverre locked himself away before risking exposing his daughter, or so we all hope.
“I have to find him,” I say. “I can’t just sit here and do nothing.”
“Right,” Jolie sighs. “Okay, how do we do this?”
I look at her sidelong. “How do we do what?”
“Go out there and get him,” she says determinedly. “We’re not incapable. If we plan it, take every precaution possible, we can do this.”
My jaw falls open, but she’s serious. That determined gleam in her eye is all the sign I need. Jolie has always been a bit crazy, but this is beyond the pale. And I like it.
“We need supplies,” I say. “And weapons. Are any of those shock sticks that we had working?”
“I think Bert has a couple stashed away that still have a charge,” Jolie says.
“What about guns?” I ask.
“No, the guns all died a long time ago,” she says. “We’ve got nothing that works.”
“I see the people on guard duty with them all the time,” I say.
“For show only. They don’t fire,” she says.
“Crap,” I say.
“Yeah,” she says. “But… we can bring Calista.”
“Calista? Why?” I ask.
“One, it will be good for her. She’s going crazy too, unable to help Ladon, so give her something to do. Two, she’s smart. Three, well, power in numbers.”
“So you want the first three girls to mate with Zmaj, to go into the desert alone?”
“I do,” she says, hands on her hip.
Jolie is tiny. So small she makes me feel big, and I’m not a big girl either, but the defiance beaming on her face is challenging me, daring me to stand against her. It’s one of the things I’ve always admired about her. She may be tiny, but she’s fierce.
“We’ll be like the three musketeers,” I say.
“As long as we’re not the ‘red shirts’ that’s fine,” Jolie says, shaking her head. “This is stupid. Really, really stupid but you’re right. We can’t just do nothing. Rosalind is going to have a cow.”
She’s right. Rosalind will never sign off on this venture. If I do this, I’m disobeying a direct order. My thoughts lock up, muscles tense, I can’t move, can barely breathe. She won’t sign off but if I don’t do this… I’m losing him. I can’t. I can’t lose my man.
“We don’t tell her,” I say, barely believing the words are mine as I say them
Jolie’s eyes wide and her mouth drops open. “Can we… do that?”
“I’m a big girl, I can do whatever in the hell I want,” I say defiantly backing up my decision with bravado. It’s always gotten me through every other stupid decision I’ve made.
“But, Rosalind,” she says.
“And?” I ask.
Jolie shakes her head silently pursing her lips. Finally she nods. “Okay, we don’t tell her.”
“Good,” I say. “Let’s do this.”
Jolie goes to leave Rverre with Inga and to convince Bert to let her have the shock sticks. She has a better relationship with him than I do. I’m fairly sure he doesn’t like me, and the feeling is mutual.