feel my way to her. My hearts pound in my ears and nothing happens. I wait, breathing deeply and exhaling slowly.
I have to find Amara. My treasure. Where are you…
My hearts slow, the raging beating in my ears drops away and then there is only the sound of my breath in and out. She’s ahead. I know it.
Opening my eyes, I walk. I’m not going to run this time. Running would be giving myself over to a panic. I’m not in a panic. I’m in control. My treasure calls to me. All I have to do is follow her song.
It is like the first time. When I saw the fire streak across the sky it was a sign. I knew in my heart that she was there waiting for me, though I didn’t understand what was waiting, there was no resisting the urge to go. I knew the moment I saw her, she was meant to be mine. It took time, but the pursuit of her was the greatest hunt of my life. She is all that matters.
The empty streets echo my footsteps back at me. Hollow. It feels wrong. There should be… something? Someone? None of it seems familiar, yet I know on some level I know this place. Fog covers my thoughts if I try to remember, obscuring the pictures of the past.
I stop, rubbing the back of my neck as I turn in a slow circle. It’s unusually warm today, and my neck itches. A slow burning sensation in my guts roils as anger builds inside me. I bare my teeth and choose a direction on instinct. It feels right, but nothing seems right.
I walk for blocks, holding to the one thing I know. Amara. Amara needs me. I need her.
As my anger builds, I begin running until I’m sprinting down the streets. A stitch forms in my side, and I push past it. My breath becomes ragged, and still I run. The muscles in my legs burn, and still I run.
The road forms a dead end, so I turn to the right and come to a halting stop. The dome shimmers at the end of the street. My hearts pound and I can’t clear my head.
“No,” I mutter, clenching and unclenching my hands. “AMARA!”
It rips out, tearing at my throat. Cold chills race down my arms. I can’t find her. She’s lost to me.
It can’t be. I can’t lose her. She is all that matters. Her, our son, my family. Where are they? Where am I?
This must be a dream. A nightmare. If I wake up, it will be over. I slap myself across the face. Pain explodes on my nose, my lips, blasting my thoughts into exploding stars. As my vision clears, I look around and… nothing.
An empty street in a dead city is all I see. I’ve lost them. Nothing else matters.
5
AMARA
“Where is he?” I ask myself for the hundredth time as I reach the wall again.
I stare out the window. The suns are low, creating long shadows stretching across the floor. He should have been home hours ago. I didn’t worry for a while—he’s been late before. No one can control everything out there, and sometimes it takes longer to unload the supplies, or there could have been a problem with the bivo. Now… now there’s no more excuses. He should be home.
I pace across the room then back again. I run my fingers through my hair, scratching my head.
“He’s okay, he’s okay, he’s okay,” I mutter under my breath.
I can’t let this bother me. If I show how scared I am, then Malcolm will get upset. More upset, I amend, looking at our son who’s watching me while moving his stone figures around on the kitchen table.
He knows. I’m not stupid, and I know he’s not either. He knows I’m worried and he knows his father should be home, but he’s handling it better than I am. Malcolm is like that, always has been. If I were to look up the word resolute in a dictionary, then Malcolm’s picture would be there.
Like we have dictionaries, but whatever. It’s not the point. Malcolm takes most everything in stride. He’s a child and his world is unshakable. Which is the way we want it. All the work that Shidan and I are doing, the Council, the bivo project, all of it is for him and all the kids. We’re creating a future for them. One that will suck less than the one we have