dirty,” I choked out. “I cheated.”
“You didn’t cheat, kitten,” he whispered as he came over to me. He knelt down in front of the chair I was sitting in and moved his hands over my knees. “You didn’t cheat. Don’t say that. You’re not a cheat. We knew what you had with Craftsman might not be done. You made sure we knew. This is all complicated, and our lives aren’t calm.”
“This wasn’t some random guy, agra,” Darby added. “If you went off with Juan, yes, that would be cheating. Yes, that would hurt us. This is Craftsman. He and Hudson go in a different category, and we accept that. All you need to worry about is what you feel and handling this how you need to.”
“Wait,” Lucca cut in, looking towards the garage. “Someone came through the portal.”
A few moments later, Mel came into the kitchen… With Hudson.
Huh?
“He’s about to freak out, and I’m saying as a dragon, I get it. Please, just give him this pass and hear him out, talk with him. You want this quiet, and he’s trying to respect your wishes. He came to me and asked what he should do as he’s losing control. This was my idea.”
“Um, okay?” I glanced at Lucca and Darby. “Is this okay?”
Darby agreed, looking confused, but Lucca nodded, sighing like he understood.
“Let’s go to the library then,” I offered, as I stood. I realized something was seriously off with Hudson when the energy didn’t dance between us, and he was one big ball of anger.
And it was pointed at me.
That hadn’t ever happened before.
It actually scared me. I shrank away from him, and he reacted like I’d slapped him, easing down a bit. He was chuffing as I hurried towards the library, his larger steps easily eating up mine.
I opened the door and let him in, and somehow I blinked and the door was closed, I was pressed against it, and he was trapping me there.
And trying to kiss me.
“Stop,” I rasped as I ducked him.
“You will for him, but not me?” he growled, sounding pained as he shook. “Why? Why, Tamsin? Why are my sins so much worse? I know you love him and not me, but—is what I did so much worse that you can forgive him and not me?”
I was so shocked by his behavior it took me a few moments to catch up to what he was saying. I moved my hands to his chest and pushed, relief filling me when he was Hudson enough to move back a bit. “What did he tell you?”
“Nothing,” he snarled. “I smelled you on him.”
Oh fuck. Just fuck. Yeah, that would set a dragon off.
I swallowed loudly, staring at his wide chest. I opened my mouth to try and explain, but he went on.
“And then he was frantically looking for you, as if worried he was losing you again. Which meant he got you back. Why forgive him and—”
“I didn’t,” I rasped. “I didn’t forgive him. I—I… I made a mistake. I did something…” I moved my hands off of him and wiped my eyes before hugging myself. “I’m sorry you smelled that. I tried to leave before anyone did on me, but I didn’t think of him. I wasn’t in a good headspace.”
He didn’t say anything for several excruciating minutes. “You didn’t forgive him?”
“No.”
“What happened?”
“Ummm…” Shit. I didn’t know what Craftsman wanted people to know.
“I don’t need details, but I think I deserve some sort of answer when I’m doing my best—maybe I don’t because of my sins, but…” Yeah, there wasn’t a really good answer there either.
And maybe he didn’t deserve an answer or anything from me, but I wasn’t trying to hurt anyone. “Something happened, and I think I saw proof he really loved me, not my magic, not that I’m a fairy that heals his hurt, or I don’t know. And then—I don’t know who started it. It was just happening. I’m sorry it hurt you. I didn’t mean for it to hurt anyone. I don’t know why I did that or what I was even doing.”
“Oh, my princess,” he whispered, reaching up and wiping tears I didn’t realize were on my cheeks.
I sniffled loudly and tried to stop them, but I could not turn off the waterworks. “I’m sorry. I didn’t forgive him. I don’t think I can. I don’t know what happened.”
“You love him. You miss him.”
The pain in his voice killed me. He didn’t say it, but what he meant was