where it’s impossible to spit it back out.
“Swallow …” he groans, his dick still deep inside.
I do my best even though the feel of him there at the back of my throat makes me gag. I gulp it down until there’s nothing left.
He cleans himself on my tongue and pulls back out again. But I will keep this down, no matter the cost, because that is the only answer. The only solution to all of my problems.
Submit to this man, and it’ll be over soon.
At least, I tell myself that while I look at him. But he refuses to look at me as he zips back up, his face scrunched up as though he’s thinking of something and doesn’t want me to see. He takes in a deep breath.
Suddenly, he marches off to the door.
“Wait,” I mutter as I get up from the carpet. My feet wobble as my bruise-covered knees aren’t used to standing yet. “Where are you going?”
He pulls the cuffs of his shirt back into place. “I have business to attend to.”
I frown. “But I gave you what you wanted.”
He pauses and glances at me over his shoulder. “If that’s what you think, then you still don’t understand why you’re here …”
He opens the door. I step closer and hold up a hand. “Wait. You can’t do this.”
“What? Leave?” His brow rises. “Are you going to stop me?”
My jaw drops. “If I did what you wanted, you’d let me out. Right?”
His lips slam together, and he breathes out a sigh. “Only you can free yourself.”
“How?” I ask, but it sounds more like a plea.
“Admit the truth,” he replies.
“What truth?”
“Stop looking for a way out, and start looking for a way in,” he says.
Then he turns around and marches off.
I run to the door. “Wait. I don’t get it. What do you mean?” But as the last word leaves my lips, the door is shut right in my face. I bang on the wood. “Please! Tell me! What did I do? If you don’t tell me, how will I know what to do?”
But there is only more silence to my questions and zero answers, just like before.
All I can do is slowly lower myself against the door as the tears stream down my cheek. I let myself believe that I could win this man over. By doing his bidding, by being his and allowing him to have his way with me, I thought I could make him fall. That he’d eventually set me free.
Instead, it was only more punishment.
Punishment for a crime I don’t know I committed.
Chapter 15
Eli
I slam the door shut behind me and stay put for a few moments, listening to the sounds emanating from behind the wood.
“Wait! Let me out!” she calls.
Her cries reach through and slice into my heart like a knife.
I wish I could go back in there. That I could hug her and tell her it’ll all be okay.
But doing so would only confuse her … and me.
I’m her captor, the one she should submit to. I’m not supposed to care.
Grinding my teeth, I throw my head back and force my legs to move. Away from that door, away from that room, away from that woman … That little angel who made me sin.
I should’ve never gone in there. It was a mistake to think I could feed her by hand, that I could make her trust me, when I can’t even control myself.
Tobias was right, and I knew it. I just didn’t want to face it.
I march straight to my room, ignoring the screams coming from down the hall. I have too much on my mind to be able to focus right now. I have to calm my nerves.
When I get inside, I immediately throw the door closed and stampede around the room. It feels as though I’m practically breathing fire. I reach for a glass of water, but that won’t quell the flames either, so I chuck it into the fireplace. I roar out loud and slam my fists onto the wooden door, enraged at myself.
How could I let myself slip that far?
She was supposed to be punished for her sins.
I wasn’t supposed to indulge in mine.
But fuck me, those pouty lips just begged to be used. And I succumbed …
I was supposed to teach her not to stray. To obey, submit, and dig deeper and deeper until she found the answers. Until she’d see just how much she’s sinned.
Instead, I was the one to lead her astray.
She thinks I’ll