I chuckled. “Well, the last thing I want is to eat enough pie to make us sick. And corn hole feels too frat party-ish. I have no idea what the hell reindeer ring toss is, but why not. Let’s give it a go.”
“Payton owes me five dollars,” she smirked. “She was positive you’d draw the line at games.”
I was starting to realize I should have when we walked over to the designated area and saw people tying actual horns to their heads only for their partners to do their best at tossing rings onto them. I winced as I watched person after person get whacked in the face with a badly aimed ring.
“Don’t worry. I’m an excellent shot,” she assured me.
“Not as good as me,” her sister Margo warned.
Payton appeared on my other side. “Oh boy. This should be interesting.”
“Why do I feel like you know something I don’t?”
She nodded towards her sisters. “They’re both competitive as hell, and when they go head to head...Watch out.”
Margo’s husband, Tom, pulled me by the arm. “Come on, buddy. Let’s get this over with.”
I swallowed hard and kneeled down for him to tie a ridiculous looking pair of horns on my head, complete with ribbons and bells. I saddled him with the same humiliating thing in return, then we took our places opposite from the feuding sisters, who were already glaring at each other like two bulls about to charge.
“Start at the sound of the bell,” Mrs. Malone announced from the sidelines. “You’ll have five minutes. The reindeer with the most rings on their horns at the end, wins.”
Hazel flashed me a somewhat frightening determined look as she got into position. Next thing I knew, the bell dinged and the rings started flying. The first few hit me directly in the face then plopped to the ground.
“You’re trying to get them on my horns, not knock me unconscious!” I shouted out.
After a few more tries, I was loosened up enough to start bobbing and weaving to do my part in catching them on my horns. The first one that actually went on and stayed on sent us both into cheering applause for ourselves. That only set Margo off more, and the more determined she became...the more ferocious Hazel was.
I was getting more into the nonsense than I cared to admit, with quite a few captured rings to show for it, when Hazel and Margo really took it to the next level. Their dad called out the final minute warning and all bets were off. It was looking like we might win until it got down to the final toss and...Bam!
I braced myself too close to the ground, and Hazel aimed too low. The ring missed my antlers by a long shot and hit straight between my legs instead. I let out a blood curdling high-pitched croak and plopped down to the ground, clutching my aching throbbing crotch.
“Chris!” Hazel screamed, running over to check on me. “Where does it hurt?” she asked frantically, feeling around my body. Her eyes trailed down to my hands, which she instinctively pushed out of the way to try and comfort the wounded area herself.
My face twisted with surprise, as did everyone else’s, as she spread her palm out across my wounded member.
“Oh my god! I’m so sorry!” she panicked, throwing her hands up in surrender. “I wasn’t thinking! I didn’t mean to…,” she trailed off and her cheeks turned bright red.
I was in too much pain to care either way. Especially when Margo informed us that they won by default.
“All your rings fell off when you hit the ground! There’s no real way to count how many you had. I’m certain we had more anyway.”
“Like hell you did!” Hazel scowled, squaring off with her. “We had seven and you only had five!”
“Five!?” she scoffed. “Yeah right. Look for yourself.”
Hazel glanced over and counted. “Oh big deal! So you had six! Our seven still would have beat you.”
Tom, Josh, and Mr. Malone were far more concerned with the horrible injury they had seen me endure and quickly came over to check on me. A little ice and a good walk later, I was back to normal...other than walking a little bow-legged.
“I really am so sorry,” Hazel apologized for the millionth time.
“Sorry for hitting me or sorry for touching me?” I quipped.
“Both,” she blushed.
“Maybe I should be thanking you. You saved me from having to participate in the big dance party.”
“Oh, that’s one of the best parts though!” she chimed.
“You