his hands when it seemed Samuel would speak. “Before you bite my nose off, you are going to have to retrace their journey. Shall I arrange my luggage?”
Samuel smiled at his friend. “We seem destined to continue adventuring together. I would appreciate your company, but I am fully aware that being newly married you will despise me for taking you away from your wife.”
“As that wife was rescued with your assistance twice, I am sure she will understand,” Miles said. He did not want to leave his darling Susan for a single night, but the service his friends had given without question made him prepared to leave her for a few days.
“I still say she is too good for you,” Samuel said, some of his usual swagger coming back.
“I couldn’t agree more,” Miles replied, ringing the bell. “I hope you aren’t going to be as annoying as usual.”
“I would imagine I shall be.”
“Oh, I was hoping that your bruised heart would keep you quiet.”
“Watch your mouth, Longdon.”
“Oh, no. This is payback, my friend. For all the mischief you caused me.”
Samuel groaned. That was a comment he could not argue against. It was going to be a long and tedious journey, and not wholly because of his worry about Esther.
Chapter 12
Samuel arrived at Corless House more subdued than he had ever been. The days of searching and travel had drained him in ways he had never thought possible. He was thankful Miles had been with him every step of the way and had kept the momentum going. He wasn’t sure what would have happened to him if he had been alone. Every time they had checked an inn and found nothing that could have led them to the group they sought, it was as if a little bit of his heart was chipped away. He went from feeling raging panic to desperate desolation, and he did not know which emotion was worse.
“They cannot be here,” Samuel said as the two men rode into Sidmouth. It felt a lifetime ago he had been with Matthew, angry that he had been sent on such a demeaning task. Oh, how things had changed!
“We have checked everywhere else,” Miles said. “There is nowhere left to search.” It had been a gruelling few days for both of them.
“I just cannot think what could have happened,” Samuel said. “How can a carriage, three passengers, a coachman and an armed military man disappear into thin air? It doesn’t make sense.”
“We will find her,” Miles said, still not sure who the her was.
Samuel grimaced at him. “I am worried about them all, but I admit …”
“I know. You feel as though you are not in control, that you are completely helpless and that your world will never be the same if she isn’t in it. Am I close to the mark?”
“Damn it, yes. This is normal?”
“Perfectly, until you can make her yours and you live happily ever after,” Miles answered.
“I am not sure I would be able to do that. I have never coveted the wedded state, or life away from London,” Samuel admitted. What he did not say was that he had been thinking about marriage for quite a while since he had met Esther. No. He could not admit that to his friend. He could barely acknowledge the fact to himself, let alone Miles, who would probably torture him with his confession.
“Neither had I. But when it hits you, you can’t do anything about it – well, you could, but having a life without the one you love in it, that would probably make you miserable for the rest of your life.”
“Wonderful. I am doomed if I do and cursed if I don’t.”
“That just about sums up becoming entangled with the love of your life.”
Samuel tried to concentrate on the road, for his throat had constricted at Miles’s words. They were strong words and had a hell of a lot of responsibility behind them. “How do you know when it is the love of your life?”
“When you are prepared to scour the country for her and hardly sleep, worrying what might have happened to her.”
“Dear Lord! I am not sure she deserves to have someone like me inflicted on her. I am not sure she even likes me.” No. That was wrong. He knew it was, but for the first time in his life, he was less confident of himself and doubting whether she would indeed consider him a serious suitor. Yes, they had shared a kiss,