hasn’t truly hit me yet. Just how utterly alone I am in the world.
But I don’t have time to dwell on it, because Chairman Valcourt wants to see me and I’m ninety-nine percent positive he’s calling me into his office to kick me out of my attic apartment.
Then what will I do?
Where will I go?
I don’t understand anything right now. The past two weeks have been a blur of denial and sadness. Denial, because I still haven’t cried. Not even when I saw my mother in her casket at the funeral. I wanted to cry, I really did. But there are just no tears inside me anymore.
Something is wrong with me.
Focus, Cadee. You’re about to get kicked out of your campus apartment. You need to come up with a plan. Something you could say to the Chairman to make him let you stay.
Do I want to stay?
These are not my people. I don’t have a single friend on this campus. My parents were my friends and now that they’re both gone, there is really nothing for me here.
But I don’t have any plans, either. This feels like the path of least resistance.
So I keep walking towards my appointment with destiny because everything feels very much out of my hands right now.
The admin building is located on the north edge of the prep-school campus. The side facing me as I walk down the central gardens is bustling with parents and students as they wrap up all their last-minute details before heading home for the summer.
Then there are the seniors who will be going to High Court College next fall. That campus is right on the other side of the admin building. And these kids are having a party in the central gardens that includes water balloons, squirt guns, and cans of brightly-colored silly string.
They are targeting everyone walking by.
I would not say the kids at Prep hate me. That’s a strong word. But I am not one of them. I’m the weird girl who lives in the Alumni Inn attic. And before that I was the weird girl who lived in the gardener’s cottage.
When they notice me coming towards them, a few of them do target me with their pranks, but most of them just look sad. They feel sorry for me. And they stare.
One kid—not even a senior, so he shouldn’t even be involved in the fun—takes aim at me. But I’m too far away to hit with his massive water gun. Then the other kids pull him back and start whispering in his ear.
I turn away before I can see the look of pity on his face.
Because today I am the girl with the dead mother.
I head towards the woods, take the long way around the art and lit buildings, and cross over onto the High Court College campus. The admin building intersects both campuses right down the middle. And while there is a high stone wall all the way around the college campus, there are also wide gates that allow access inside.
That’s my route today.
And what the hell? I might as well enjoy the beauty of this place one last time before I have to move on. Because I know what’s coming. Probably everyone knows what’s coming.
My days here are over. They died with my mother two weeks ago in that car crash.
I pass through the wide gate that leads into the college side of the campus and let out a long breath.
There are far fewer people over here. The cottage houses that act as dorms for the college are all in the woods near the stadium. So while it’s probably a madhouse in the parking lots, over here it’s relatively quiet. Just a few dozen smaller groups hanging outside the admin building.
I climb the steps and I’m just reaching for the door when it comes slamming open and I jump back in surprise, stumble backwards, and then crash into a girl coming up directly behind me.
The cause of the crashing door is a tall student. Big and muscular and smells like he slept in a brewery last night.
The girl I bumped into pushes me aside and then she and he are face to face, scowling at each other.
The muscular boy growls at her. “Watch where you’re fucking going, Mona.”
“Suck my dick, Cooper.” She places one hand on his broad chest and pushes him out of her way, then disappears through the open door.
I stare at her back until the door closes and obstructs my view. Then I