If I was in her body and mind, then maybe I wouldn't have to deal with mine for a while. My withdrawal would pass more quickly.
Lissa and her group had returned from the
Royal Court
a bit more grimly than they arrived. The cold light of morning had made Lissa feel incredibly idiotic about the party's events. Dancing on a table wasn't the worst thing in the world, but looking back over other parties she'd been to that weekend and her social life with Avery made her wonder what had gotten into her. Sometimes, she didn't even feel like herself. And the kiss with Aaron... well, that was an entirely different guilt-inducing matter altogether.
"Don't worry about it," Avery told her on the plane. "We all do stupid stuff when we're drunk."
"Not me," groaned Lissa. "This isn't like me." Despite this claim, Lissa had nonetheless agreed to drink mimosas-champagne mixed with orange juice-on the ride back.
Avery smiled. "I don't have anything to compare it to. You seem okay to me. But then, you aren't trying to run off with a human or some non-royal guy."
Lissa smiled back, and her eyes went to Jill, sitting a little ahead of them on the plane. Adrian had spoken to the younger girl earlier, but she was busy with a book now, her biggest concern seeming to be to stay away from Reed. He sat with Simon again, and Lissa was a little surprised to see the guardian eyeing Jill suspiciously. Maybe Reed had told Simon that the younger girl was some kind of threat.
"You're worried about her?" asked Avery, following Lissa's gaze.
"It's not that... I just can't shake the way she looked at me last night."
"She's young. I think she's easily shocked."
Lissa supposed that was true. Yet young or not, there had been something refreshingly clear and honest in the way Jill had called Lissa out. It reminded Lissa of something I might do. And Lissa couldn't rest easy knowing someone like that thought badly of her. Lissa stood up.
"I'll be right back," she told Avery. "I'm going to talk to her."
Jill was obviously astonished when Lissa sat beside her. The younger girl put a bookmark in what she was reading, and whatever she might be feeling, her smile for Lissa was genuine. "Hey."
"Hey," said Lissa. She hadn't had much of the mimosa yet and still controlled enough spirit to see Jill's aura. It was a rich teal blue, interspersed with purple and darker blue. Good, strong colors. "Look, I wanted to apologize for what happened last night... what I said..."
"Oh," said Jill flushing. "It's okay, really. I mean, things were kind of crazy, and I know you weren't thinking straight. At least, I don't think you were. I don't really know. I've never actually had a drink, so I can't say." Jill's nervousness always seemed to make her oscillate between rambling and silence.
"Yeah, well, I should have been thinking straight before I got in that situation. And I'm really sorry for what happened with Reed." Lissa lowered her voice. "No clue what happened there... but that wasn't right, what he did and said to you."
Both girls found themselves studying him. He was deep in a book, but suddenly, as though he could sense them watching, his gaze turned toward Jill and Lissa. He glared, and they immediately looked away.
"That definitely wasn't your fault," said Jill. "And, you know, Adrian was there and everything. So it turned out okay."
Lissa worked to keep a straight face. Adrian was sitting out of their view, but if he hadn't been, Lissa had a feeling Jill would have been gazing at him dreamily. Adrian was doing a good deal of gazing of his own at Avery lately, and Lissa could see Jill was never going to leave that little-sister role for him. Yet it seemed clear that Jill was developing a little bit of a crush. It was cute, and even though Lissa knew it was stupid on her part, she couldn't help feeling a bit of relief that Adrian was the object of Jill's affections and not Christian.
"Well, here's hoping for better choices," said Lissa. "And hoping no one thinks too badly of me."
"I don't," said Jill. "And I'm sure Christian won't either."
Lissa frowned, confused for a moment. "Well... there's no point in stressing him out over it. It was my stupid mistake; I'll deal with it."
Now Jill frowned. She hesitated before speaking, that old nervousness returning. "But you have to. You have to tell him the truth, right?"
"It's