it all the way up to this floor and not giving it the release it demands. It scares me how hungry I am for Zayne already, after barely any time of knowing him.
I reach the ground floor and step out of the elevator, make a beeline for the front desk. Paul is still standing there, in the same spot where I walked past him an hour ago, smiling cheerily at one of the second floor tenants as she breezes past.
I sidestep to let her into the elevator, then approach the front desk, chest tight.
“Hey Paul.”
He blinks, though if he’s surprised to see me speaking to him first, he conceals it well behind that practiced smile of his. “Ms. Walker. How can I help you?”
“Um.” This is going to sound weird. I know it is. But there’s nothing I can really do about that just now. “I’m looking for Zayne, actually. Have you seen him?”
Paul’s eyebrows do a little dance above his face, as though deciding whether or not to rise in surprise. Eventually, he settles for just smiling a smidge wider, still polite as ever. “He’s out for lunch at the moment. His shift starts at 4 today, if you’d like to stop back then. Although, if it’s anything I can help you with in the meantime, I’d be delighted to offer my assistance.”
Unless you happen to be an expert in tracking down cyber stalkers or revenge porn enthusiasts, I don’t think you can, I resist saying. I just smile instead. “Thanks, Paul. I’ll stop back later.”
But my mind is already racing. I think about the coffee shop where we ate our first meal together, what feels like a lifetime ago already, even though it’s only been a few days. I know it’s a long shot, but he did say it’s one of his favorite spots in the area. Maybe that’s where he’d go now.
I speed-walk the few blocks there, heart in my throat. All the while, I can feel my phone buzzing in my pocket, every few minutes another text or phone call. Some of the callers have started leaving voicemails, which I don’t even want to listen to. I delete them all unread, and wonder how hard it will be to program my phone to send all these new incoming calls straight to voicemail in the future. Will I have to change my number? Can I block this many phone numbers?
Zayne couldn’t have done this to me. He wouldn’t. But maybe he’ll have some idea how to help fix it. Or at least some advice on what could’ve gone wrong. Did his phone get stolen? Did someone break into it?
I reach the café and steal a peek through the windows. Sure enough, there he is at the back table, the same one we shared last Friday when he was trying to cheer me up after my especially shitty day at work. He doesn’t see me yet—he’s still eating, his eyes fixed on the seat across from him, half-glazed, as though deep in thought. I wonder what about. I wonder if he knows how horribly my life has blown up since I left him this morning.
I wonder if he had something to do with it.
I steel my heart. Push through the doors into the restaurant.
He glances up when the bell jingles, and his eyes light up at the sight of me, a smile spreading across his face. He half-rises from his chair by the time I make it to his table, but I pull out the other seat before he can reach me and drop into it, bypassing a hug. I can’t get distracted, and I know I will if I let him touch me. I need to talk about this with a clear head, to get straight answers.
“What’s wrong?” Zayne asks, after taking one look at my expression. I can’t imagine what I look like right now. Murderous? Scared? On the brink of tears?
I feel like all three at once.
In response, I pull out my phone. I tap on the screen and open the website and I pass it to him without a word. My throat aches, and my eyes sting. Something about this feels worse than knowing my office saw the photo. Zayne was the intended recipient of this picture, so why does it bother me for him to see it again?
That’s not it, I realize. What bothers me is the caption, the comments under it. The talking-to my boss gave me earlier today. The way the