to relax around his completely before he pulled out. He sprawled beside me again, but under the covers now, and slowly traced lines down my breasts, stomach and thighs with his fingers. It was both stimulating and very comforting.
"What are you holding back?" he asked. "Why not claim your real name? You don't really want to be Jenny."
I bit my lip. "I don't. I've never been...right, as Jenny. I'm not her."
"You're my Celeste," he said.
"In private," I finally said. "Only when we're alone. I'm...I'm not ready."
"It's because Bernard has some hold on you," Bevan said, anger suddenly darkening his voice, whiplash-fast. "But he will never get you back from me. I'll fight for you...anytime, anywhere."
I wrapped my arms around Bevan's neck and folded my body against him, feeling that protection wash over me.
"I take it back," I said, kissing his broad chest. "I do like you this way."
Chapter Seven
Jenny
I felt a little bit better the next day after a good night's sleep, knowing Bevan was near, but when I woke, it was Variel there with me again.
"I--I told you I didn't want to see you."
"But you were happy enough to let Piers care for you?" Variel looked offended, his eyes lifting from a book. "I am not doing anything to bother you."
"I've already explained why I'm upset with you. I'd rather be by myself."
"I was instructed to make sure you eat, once you've woken up again," he said. "Something more solid this time."
I really wasn't good at being insistent, so I watched and bit my tongue as he served up some new dish. Chicken soup, I was pretty sure. He gave me the bowl and silently watched me take the first bite. "Do you need any salt?" he asked.
"No! Please just...step outside or something.”
His lip curled, like the answer disgusted him. Well, we agreed on something.
"My lady," he said, and just the way he'd decided he was going to call me by some formal title now was awkward. “As I said, the faery queen personally requested that I attend to you."
"Does the faery queen want to punish me!?"
His red eyes smoldered with either anger or chagrin; it was hard to tell because his face was always restrained of emotion. His features were noble, and I didn't used to mind looking at them, but now I only felt pain when I saw him, as I was reminded how I almost trusted him once.
"No," he said. "She wants to punish me. In fact, she wants you to decide the punishment. I suspect she is forcing us together so you can get a good judge of my character."
I was absorbed in a coughing fit when I tried to speak. "I have to decide your punishment!?"
"Indeed."
"But I...I don't really want to punish people. I'm afraid I'll go soft on you!"
He gave me a tight smile that was dangerously close to a smirk. "You are certainly a gentle personality. I could give you some advice on how to best punish someone."
I had the feeling that this would sound naughty. He wasn't even the smallest bit intimidated at the idea of my punishment. I couldn't blame him. I didn't want to see anyone tortured, or locked in a dungeon eating rat-infested food. Not even Variel.
Maybe the punishment should fit the crime, I thought. Someone could watch him while he has sex!
No, I had the distinct feeling that wouldn't mean much to him the way it did to me. Plus, I didn't want to watch him have sex with anyone.
“I don’t want you to go too soft on me,” Variel said. “Perhaps you could tie me to a post and strike me until I bleed all over and then leave me there for days.”
“That sounds absolutely terrible.”
“But I would endure it bravely,” Variel said. “Then, you’d feel much better about my company after that, because we’d have had it out.”
“I think I would just be haunted by it forever…”
“I think I would remember it fondly as a sign of your strength, my lady.”
“You’re a very strange man.”
“And you are too dear a girl for this task. I’m sure that’s why everyone’s in love with you.”
“Everyone? In love with me? I hardly know anyone."
"If Piers isn't in love with you as well, I shall eat a boulder," Variel said. "But I certainly don't understand why the queen wants him to attend to you as well. He isn't your fated husband like I am, or…your lad Bevan.”
“I am going to find some kind of good punishment for you," I