there, Mom, I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”
Smoke jumper. She would make a great smoke jumper.
CHAPTER FOUR
Sadie
In the blur of terror that followed Juliet’s call, I rented a car and drove through the snarl of traffic between Manhattan and Connecticut, doing eighty miles an hour when I could, slamming on the brakes when I saw taillights. Even though I’d tried calling Alexander as soon as I hung up with Jules, he wasn’t answering. He had a habit of keeping the phone off while he drove, which was not at all convenient at this moment. After leaving six messages, I called Carter and told him instead, hiccuping with sobs.
“Oh, sweetheart,” he said. “Good luck. I’m here for anything you need. If you want me to call Sister Mary or anything, if you need me to water your plants, let me know.”
The whole way there, tears streaked down my cheeks and I had to fight not to break down. My dad had been my idol growing up—always encouraging, upbeat and fun . . . not to mention the parent who actually liked me. He taught me to play poker and swim and never said art school was a bad idea. He told me I was pretty and never criticized my clothes, even in my goth stage. He came to visit me once a month in the city, and still held my hand when we were crossing the street. He couldn’t be dying. Not without me there.
All my life, there’d been a clear division in the family. Juliet “Perfection from Conception” was Mom’s; I, the lesser child in just about every measurable aspect except artistic ability, was Dad’s. He never seemed to think he got the short end of the stick.
“Please don’t die, please don’t die,” I chanted under my breath. Who else would root for me the way he did? Who else would be so . . . so delighted at every turn of my life? It seemed that all my childhood, Mom had lectured on everything from posture to how to clean the bathroom to grades, and Dad had been right behind her, sweeping away the criticism with a grin or a wink and maybe a trip to the ice cream parlor. Everything he did let me know I was loved, whereas everything Mom did let me know I was wrong.
There was a reason I rarely came back to Stoningham, and when I did, it was only for a day. And there was a reason my father came to visit me in the city, sleeping on the pullout couch, thinking it was the best fun ever. Those were always like old times, when I was little and afraid of thunderstorms, and Dad would tell me stories about girl warriors who rode monsters they’d tamed into battle.
My chest felt like it was being crushed. Where the hell was Alexander? Why wasn’t he calling me?
Finally, after an eternity, I pulled into the UConn Health Center’s giant parking lot, threw my shitty little rental in park and ran to get inside, slipping and sliding, since the rain had frozen when the temperature dropped, and it was a good ten degrees colder up here.
An orderly directed me to the family waiting area, and I ran there, too.
Mom, Jules and Oliver were in the waiting room, Jules looking worried, Mom a thousand miles away.
“Is he—” I began, but my voice choked off.
“Unconscious but alive,” Oliver said, getting up to hug me. “He made it through surgery. We’re waiting for the doctor to tell us what we can expect.”
My sister got up and we hugged awkwardly, too. She stepped on my foot, and my hair got tangled in her earring for a second.
“Hi, Mom,” I said.
“Hello, Sadie.” Her voice was expressionless. Shock, I guessed. She was clutching a plastic bag to her chest. I kissed her cheek, and she still didn’t look at me. “Hello, Sadie,” she repeated, and I felt a twinge of sympathy.
“Hi, Mom. You doing okay?” She was younger than Dad, and I’d heard that seventy was the new forty, but still.
“I’m fine,” she said. My hands were shaking, but she seemed utterly calm.
“Can I see him?”
“He’s resting.”
“I’d like to see him.”
“Sure, sure,” said Jules. “Come on. We’re only allowed a few minutes an hour, but come say . . . well.” Her voice choked off, and she took a shaky breath.
We walked down a long, brightly lit hallway and went into a room.
Oh, God. Oh, Daddy.
He was on a ventilator, his face swollen,