ran off earlier, of course. I grew tired from my journey and decided to…” She bent her knees and let her legs fall open. “To crawl naked into your bed and hope that you would see what I’ve been attempting to show you from the day I met you. I’m in love with you. Forget the Drimuti, Dexx. I can make you happy.”
“Kreia is my lifemate, Avanya. We’ve bonded. I will have only her.” I turned to leave, but she leaped from the bed and launched herself at me. I was in a hurry to find my mate, and my mind was full of worry and doom.
Something was wrong, and I knew it. I felt it. I’d failed Kreia, and darkness and rage rose up to choke me. I had to find her.
But Avanya mewled like a sick infant and clung to me, refusing to let me go when I had to go. That was my only excuse for what I did next. I lost my mind for a moment. I grabbed the back of her neck and slammed her against the wall, my intentions bad. I wanted to hurt her. I froze when her wide, terrified stare penetrated the fog in my mind and I realized my fingers were around her throat. I released her so fast she fell to the floor, her mouth open, and slowly, anger replaced the fear in her face.
I backed away, my palms up. “I’m sorry,” I muttered, my voice hoarse. Fuck. Fuck. I strode from the room, horrified. I would not hit a woman. I would not become my stepfather. “Fuck,” I whispered.
Bo hadn’t gone to town after all, and when he saw me leave the cabin he dropped the cup he was holding and hurried to me. “Dexx, what happened?”
“I…” I cleared my throat, unable to look at him. He knew my story. “Kreia is missing. She’s in trouble. I feel it. She’s my fated mate, Bo, and I feel it. Something is fucking wrong. I didn’t protect her.”
“Whoa there, boss. Being her fated mate doesn’t mean she’s a kid and you’re her daddy. You’ll be better to get that shit out of your head.” But his lips thinned and he frowned, almost as worried as I was.
“I failed her,” I said, taking time to grab a rope and a flask of water from my supplies. “I won’t do it again.”
“She may have been attacked by a feral or fallen into a bog,” Bo said, maybe thinking, for some reason, that he was making me feel better, “but she’s not dead. You’re tied to her now, and you’d feel it if her heart stopped beating. That light inside you would blink out like—”
“Shut the fuck up.”
“Sorry, boss.” He turned to gesture at a couple of the other guards. “She’ll be okay. I’ve grown attached to the little thing myself.” He nodded. “She’ll be okay.”
“Avanya threw herself at me inside the cabin,” I murmured. “I slammed her against the wall. I almost hit her, Bo.”
He said nothing for a few moments. Then, just as three of the other guards joined us, their hands on the hilts of their weapons, he said, “But you didn’t hit her. You stopped yourself, and you’re about as fucked up as you can be right now. You’re not him, Dexx, and Avanya is not your mother. Let it go. Just think about Kreia.”
I said nothing. Grimly silent, we led the other men over the rough, dark terrain, and once we were deeper into the woods, I stopped and turned to them. “Split up. Find her.”
Maybe death was in my eyes, because they backed away hurriedly, nodding. Graez, usually mouthy and brash, lowered his stare, his face pale.
Somehow, the little street thief had sneaked into all my guards’ affections.
“We’ll find her,” Bo said.
“I’ll take the town,” Grathus told me. “Maybe she’s sitting in a pub having a drink and a meal.”
“Wherever she is,” I said quietly, “she’s in trouble.”
“She’s his fated mate,” Bo said, as though they might think I was overreacting. “He’s going to feel her distress.”
I loped away, the dread in the pit of my stomach growing heavier with each passing moment. Dawn came, cold and damp. She’d been out here all night. When I’d last seen her, she’d been dressed in a thin shirt, pants, and boots. No coat, no hat, no gloves—and the night had been frigid.
“Damn you, Kreia. Damn you.”
But I wasn’t mad at her for leaving. I was mad at myself for letting