my bed read: 2:00.
“You should go,” I mumble. “Your mom is going to flip out. I’ll be all right.”
“Okay,” Mel says. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
I must fall asleep because I don’t remember feeling the bed shift as she got up, or the soft click of my bedroom door shutting. I don’t dream, and I don’t move until nearly ten the next morning when I wake up in a pool of sunlight, my arms pinned to my sides under the tight sheet Mel folded around me.
The night comes rushing back in a flood of regret, and I jump out of bed and hang my head over my wastebasket, dry heaving at the memory of the smell of cigarette smoke.
“You’re okay,” I whisper to myself, staring down at wads of mascara-stained tissue and the wrapper from a pack of fruit snacks I ate the day before. “You’re okay.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Noel Callenbaugh
At Battle of the Bands
3/l0
Oliver (Mark’s brother)
Also at Battle of the Banks (on the hand)
l/l0
Thomas
Again, the fateful night at Battle of the Bands
-l0/l0
A few days later I drive Jeffrey over to Dad and Lila’s house. I bought a card for them and made Jeffrey write Congratulations! on the inside. Whatever this new job is that Lila’s taking, wherever they need to move—it’s an opportunity for our family, and we need to be happy for them. Even if the thought of being so far from Kaylee is like a stab in the heart.
“Jeffrey! Veda!” Lila answers the door, and Kaylee comes running when she hears our names, throwing her arms around my knees. “Come in.”
Dad’s watching TV in the living room, his feet up on the couch. He mutes the TV when we walk in and stands up, hands on his hips. “What’s going on?” he asks, his gaze shifting from me to Jeffrey and back again. Lila sidles up next to him and slips an arm around his waist.
I nudge Jeffrey, and he holds out the envelope. “We just wanted to say congratulations on your new job,” he says, and I’m proud of how strong his voice sounds. “We’re really excited for you. And we’ll miss you.”
Lila gives a little gasp and turns her face into Dad’s chest. He rubs her back in slow circles.
“Thank you so much,” Lila says, turning back to us and taking the envelope from Dad’s hand, carefully ripping it open. “This really means a lot.”
Kaylee tugs on my hand, and I lift her into my arms. “We’ll get to go on a plane to visit you sometimes,” I tell her. “It’ll be an adventure.”
She looks at me seriously, her blue eyes wide. “Plane,” she says.
Lila wipes her eyes and smiles. “Hey, are you guys hungry? I just made brownies.”
Jeffrey pushes his bangs out of his eyes. “Yeah, definitely.” He follows Lila back to the kitchen, and Kaylee wiggles out of my arms and races after them.
Dad hasn’t moved, his face impassive.
“I’m sorry for running off at the reunion,” I say, lowering my voice and bracing myself for his reaction. “I’ve had a rough summer.”
Dad nods. “I think we all have.” He clears his throat and awkwardly swings his arms back and forth. “Look, Vee, we should have told you and Jeffrey about the move first. That was a mistake on my part.”
“It’s okay.”
“It’s been a stressful decision. Lila is”—he lets out a long breath—“nervous about it.”
I glance toward the kitchen. “Is she okay?”
Dad looks at me. “She has some problems, Veda. I’m sure you’ve noticed a thing or two going on with her.”
I nod.
“But I love her.” Dad’s voice cracks. “She’s getting counseling. And this is a big step for her career.”
“I know.” I play with the hem of my shorts. “But I’m still sad you’re leaving. And so is Jeffrey.”
“I honestly didn’t think you’d care.”
I look up at him. “How could we not care? Our baby sister and our . . . our dad are moving halfway across the country.”
The look that crosses Dad’s face is half joy, half pain. “Well, I’m going to miss you guys,” he says. “You know, I didn’t ever want to leave you. Everything that happened wasn’t because you weren’t good enough.” He holds his arms out wide. “God knows, Lila and I aren’t perfect either. We’re just a better fit than your mom and I ever were.”
I nod and look down at the floor, not sure where to go from here.
“I could have tried harder,” Dad says finally. “To try to work things out with your mom. And to not be