risky—you might fall into the river and drown.”
I push my foot deeper into the river, feeling for the colder water that lies a few inches beneath the sun-warmed surface. “I promise to wear my floaties.”
“No way.” Killian takes his hat off and lies down on his back on the dock, dropping the hat over his face to block the sun. “This is a two-person operation, counselor. Team Us.”
I hope the canoers are just taking their time coming down the river, maybe stopping at one of the tiny islands to explore. I’m not sure what we’ll do if something is actually wrong.
Killian’s only able to suffer through a few minutes of silence before he gets the conversation going again. I’ve never met anyone so interested in life that they can’t bear to stop talking about it. “So,” he says.
I look down at his broad body spread across the dock, his fingers drumming nervously on the weathered boards, and my stomach tightens. “So.”
“You didn’t text me back.”
I wince. “No, I didn’t. I’m sorry.”
He taps his fingers on the dock, waiting for more. I kick my feet, watching water droplets fly into the air, my mouth clamped shut. I should have texted him back. I know exactly what I would have said: i liked yesterday, too. But how can I go from texting a guy one minute to kissing someone else the next?
Killian sighs. “Okay . . . new topic of conversation. Remember that night we came out here with Mel and those other guys?”
My face heats up. He just dives right into the awkward conversations. “Yes. Didn’t we talk about this already?”
Killian’s fingers stop their frantic dance. “Sorry. I don’t mean to keep bringing it up. But I was just curious . . . Pop-music–hater Seth seemed kind of into Mel. Are they together?”
I shrug. I don’t want to think about Seth and Mel right now. “It’s complicated. They’re best friends.”
“I think Mel was trying to use me to make him jealous.” Killian’s voice is calm and flat, just stating the facts.
I stay quiet. That is definitely what Mel was doing, but it sounds extra-terrible when Killian says it out loud. “I don’t think she does it consciously. She’s not awesome at relationships. Flirting, yes. Actually being committed to someone, not so much.”
Then it hits me—this is the main reason it’s so upsetting to think of Mel and Seth getting together. Not because I irrationally want to keep Seth for myself even though I don’t like him that way, or because I want them both to love me more than they love each other, but because their relationship has an expiration date. They’ll be happy for a few months before Mel gets distracted and finds some other guy to chase, and Seth will be devastated. And that will be the end of the three of us.
Killian sits up quickly, his hat dropping into his lap. His face is only a few inches from mine, and all I can see is slightly sunburned cheeks and clear blue eyes. “What about you, Vee? Are you any good at relationships?”
I tear my gaze away from Killian’s and struggle not to laugh. I used to think I was an expert at being in a relationship. If you had asked me six months ago, I would have said I was an A+, honor-roll, Dean’s-list-quality-relationship partner. But the fact that I was completely blindsided when my boyfriend broke up with me suggests I still have some things to learn in that department.
“I—” A loud whoop cuts me off, and four canoes float into sight. “Thank God, there they are,” I say, scrambling to my feet. The crowd in the canoes waves their paddles in the air and sing along to the strains of “Sweet Home Alabama” coming from iPod speakers set up on one of the seats.
“Great. They’re totally hammered.” Killian rises to his feet. “But I do love this song. I’ll put the canoes away if you can get them to the parking lot so we can close the gate behind them.”
“Deal.” I stare at the approaching canoers, feeling Killian’s eyes on me but afraid to meet his gaze. “I bet we can be out of here in half an hour.”
The canoers greet us with big hugs and slaps on the back, and half-coherent stories about their beer-soaked day as they stumble through the shallow water at the edge of the river, unloading coolers, empty bottles, and sopping wet towels. It takes a little longer than half