the light from it. “You good to share?”
“Of course.” I nodded, and he upped the wattage. I could’ve melted.
“And two iced teas.” He spoke without breaking eye contact, and I was pinned to my seat, completely under his control. I loved how he shone under the attention of others, and I was getting a glimpse of the carefree guy he was when he wasn’t under siege. And I wanted to see more of it. “Great. Gotta stay hydrated and caffeinated to keep up with this one.” Julie shot me a wink and pointed to Seb with her pen. “Pizza and two iced teas coming’ up, boys.”
“She’s great.” He cracked his neck and watched her walk away.
“You two are friends?” I tried to hide my suspicious jealousy, but it leaked into my voice.
But maybe he couldn’t tell, because he shifted in his seat and shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”
“Oh. More than that?” I sounded way more like a shocked old man than I’d wanted and hoped Seb hadn’t noticed, but he burst out laughing.
He leaned forward and took both my hands in his reassuringly. “No. I only swing one way and it’s not in Julie’s direction. I just mean that I guess she’s a friend, but she was always more of a workmate. I used to do the coffees here.”
“Ah. Right.” I hated how much it relieved me. “What else don’t I know about you?”
He paused for a moment, as though considering, then quickly shook his head. “Nuh-uh. No way. You already know some deep dark shit about what I’m going through, and I know next to nothing about you. Imbalance of power.”
“What do you want to know?” I set my sunglasses down and opened my hands like I was a book to be read, but I hoped he wouldn’t pry too deeply.
“Hm… What’s this about?” Seb slapped his bicep.
“Ah. Easy.” I rolled the sleeve of my t-shirt up to reveal the thick figure eight tattooed on my upper arm and a surge of pride made me smile as I looked at it. “All the brothers have one.”
“Ha! Eight of you. Right. Cool. Why is it on its side, though?” He tilted his head as though to see it upright. “Oh, wait. Looks like an infinity symbol…”
“Exactly. Never-ending bond. And it’s a perfectly balanced symbol, and we balance each other out.” I watched him watching me, and a tingle ran up my spine as he wet his lips.
“Nice.” He smiled at my arm and tilted his head again. “You know, it’s also kind of a Mobius strip.”
I was about to ask what he thought about it, when Julie reappeared with our iced teas and pizza, and a bonus basket of garlic bread. “Compliments of the chef, to keep Seb’s mouth full.”
He shoved a piece in his mouth and gave her a bready smile before she left. I hadn’t realized how hungry I was until a waft of the pizza hit me and my stomach grumbled.
“Mobius strip?” I asked as I took a slice onto my plate.
“Oh, yeah. It’s a nice allegory.” He spoke around a mouthful of pizza, then held up a hand while he washed it down with iced tea. “You know, a twisted piece of paper or whatever, to create a shape like that figure eight. If an ant was going to run around the sides of it, the ant would touch both sides without ever having to cross the edge. It’s like, you can all go through shit, without ever having to ‘cross the edge’ or leave your brotherhood, or whatever you call it.”
I took a long gulp of my tea, alarmed by how touched I was at his reading of the tattoo, and cleared my throat. “Yeah. That sounds right.”
“Cool. As you may have gathered, I don’t have that kind of relationship with my brother. He’s kind of a dick.” He grinned like it was no big deal, but I caught the pain in his voice.
I smoothed down the sleeve of my shirt. “Yeah, it doesn’t sound good.”
“He’s a homophobic asshole.” Seb turned his plate and kept his eyes on his pizza, but I swore there was a tear in his eye.
“Shit. I’m sorry.” I wanted to say more but he shrugged and stuffed his mouth with an oversized bite of pizza, as though putting a stop to the conversation. We ate and conversed in satisfied moans, until I couldn’t hold back my curiosity anymore.
“Do you have any?” I looked him over as though searching for tattoos and