them?” Mike asked, and I wanted to high-five him for thinking of that question.
“Because I only woke up with the idea last night,” Dagger said. “First thing this morning, I called a group I know who does this style of singing. They were interested in the gig, but they couldn’t make it here today, so I sent them a copy of the audio we recorded here the other day to use for practice. They’ll meet with you in Nevada at your soundcheck, and you can rehearse the song with them then. If for any reason you don’t like what they add to your show, then they’ll be there as spectators, only as my guests. Rocktoberfest is your gig, not mine, and all I’m doing is giving you a professional suggestion from one musician to another. If this were my show, I’d want to bring down the house with a finale like this, but you have the final say.”
This was a lot to think about. The entire performance was overwhelming as it was, and now he was shoving something last minute at us? I suddenly felt lightheaded, like there wasn’t enough air in the room to fill my lungs. I struggled to draw in a breath and made a wheezing sound. Mike was on his feet and moving toward me before I fell, and he caught me in his arms.
“Fletcher, breathe with me,” Mike directed, using a calm, even voice. “Nice and slow. In … out … in … and out.”
“What’s going on here?” Dagger asked, coming to stand beside where Mike was holding me steady. “Does he have asthma?”
“No, he occasionally gets panic attacks,” Potter informed Dagger.
“Jesus, Fletch,” Dagger soothed. “Why haven’t you ever mentioned this before?”
I couldn’t answer him. My focus at the moment was simply drawing in my next breath and listening to the sound of Mike’s voice.
“You’re doing great,” Mike said. “Exhale slowly. That’s it.”
I’ve had far worse episodes than this, and I was beyond grateful that Dagger hadn’t seen a full-blown attack or he’d probably be second-guessing his decision to send us to Rocktoberfest. I glanced over at him and noticed the concern on his face without any pity, which was what I always feared when someone new watched this happen to me. Thankfully, not many people had witnessed my meltdowns.
A few more minutes of concentrating on my breathing, and I was almost back to normal—or as normal as could be. We decided to call it a day so everyone could go home and pack to leave in the morning. Dagger caught me on my way out. I knew he’d want to talk to me, and I hoped I hadn’t blown our shot at this huge show.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I am,” I nodded. “I’m sorry you saw that, but it’s nothing of any concern. I can do the show.”
“I never doubted your ability to perform, Fletch, and I’m sorry I triggered this,” Dagger apologized. “I shouldn’t have sprung the whole choir thing at you like that, but the idea woke me from sleep, and I thought it held enough merit to see if I could make it happen. But seriously, if you guys don’t like the sound they add to your piece, then they won’t go on stage with you.”
“I have complete faith in your knowing what will work for us, but there’s just so much …” I said before my voice trailed off. Dagger tipped his head to see my face.
“Fletch, talk to me,” Dagger said. “There’s nothing you’re feeling right now that I haven’t felt before a show, so what’s going on?”
“It’s a lot for me to process,” I began, “and I’m nervous we’ll get on stage, and I’ll choke or have an attack that will embarrass the shit out of me.”
“Hey, I’m not going to let that happen, okay?” Dagger reassured. “Do you take medication for this, or is there something you typically do when you feel anxious?”
“I don’t like taking drugs, and what Mike does works best,” I said. “Dallas is good at calming me. He gives me a look that, for some reason, brings me back to center myself. I know that sounds crazy as hell, but it works. He’s a source of peace for me.”
“That doesn’t sound crazy at all,” Dagger agreed. “Ryan is my peace, and we’ll do whatever works for you. If Dallas is the key, then I’ll see if Skully will give him a break while you guys are performing, and we’ll have him stand just