with my gaze pointed at my feet. “I need to go and … think.”
Dallas grabbed on to my forearm as I started to step away, and my gaze lifted to his. “Promise me when you do your thinking that you won’t dwell on the fact I’m a guy,” he said. “Focus on how this made you feel because at the end of the day that’s all that really matters.”
His words were powerful and ran on a loop inside my head as I walked across the parking lot. I had so much to think about that I didn’t know where to begin.
Begin at the kiss.
That was where everything changed.
Chapter Five
I pulled out my phone to order an Uber while I walked away from the trailers and scheduled my pick up. Before I could slide it back into my pants pocket, it rang in my hand. I looked at the screen, saw it was Dagger, and quickly answered.
“Hey, what's up?”
“I wanted to see if you met up with Spumoni today,” Dagger asked.
“I did and … wow,” I said.
“Wow, what?”
“His stuff is strong.”
“I warned you about that.”
“You did, but I didn't expect … that,” I replied and took a right onto the sidewalk to wait for my Uber driver in front of the rehearsal warehouse.
“Now that you know the potency, don't make the mistake of smoking too much before you perform,” Dagger cautioned.
“I'll be careful,” I said. “No way will I risk blowing an opportunity like this event by being too stoned to go out on stage.”
The truth was, I’d be lucky if I could coax myself out onto the stage sober and clear-minded because of the anxiety I had in front of big crowds. I couldn’t even fathom how big the audience would realistically be at Rocktoberfest, but I’d seen footage of shows like this one on the internet, and the crowd looked like a moving sea of people in front of the stage. The scene scared the fuck out of me, and I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to handle it and remain standing long enough to play.
“Glad to hear it,” Dagger said. “I know everyone is nervous because this is a big show, but now is the time you need to nail every detail about your performance.”
Behind me, I heard Dallas yell something to his father, who must have been standing on the loading dock. It brought the memory of us kissing into the forefront of my brain.
“You still there?”
“Yeah, my head is messed up right now.”
“Spumoni's weed do that to you?” Dagger questioned.
“Sort of, but something else happened too,” I said, then wondered if I should keep my mouth shut.
“Is this something I should know about?” Dagger asked.
I rubbed at my forehead and thought for a moment. “I'm going to see if I can sort through this myself.”
“Fletch? I probably don't need to say this, but you can talk to me about anything,” Dagger added. “Nothing you have to say is going to piss me off, shock, or disappoint me, and the topic doesn’t have to be business-related either. Got it?”
I had no doubt Dagger would be a great listener, and since he was gay, I knew he'd be an insightful sounding board considering the crazy, jumbled mess my brain was left in after Dallas had kissed me senseless. “I might just take you up on that,” I remarked. “Let me sleep on it tonight, and I'll let you know.”
“Did Spumoni try anything with you when he gave you the bag of weed?” Dagger asked.
“What? No, not at all,” I replied, “but Dallas did tell me about how Spumoni sometimes conducts his business.”
“He doesn't mean anything by it,” Dagger said, “and he certainly wouldn't push anything on you that you didn't want.”
“He was cool,” I confirmed. “He simply gave me the bag and we talked for a few minutes, and then he got pulled away to deal with someone on the equipment team.”
“I'm glad to hear he treated you well,” Dagger said.
There was a brief pause, and I couldn’t explain what compelled me in that moment to blurt out what had my brain working overtime, but the next thing I knew, the words were spilling from my mouth. “Dallas kissed me,” I said.
“Dallas kissed you? I thought you were straight?”
“I am … well, I thought I was, but I guess I'm not as straight as I believed.”
“Have you ever fooled around with a guy?”
“Not once,” I admitted. “I can't say I'd ever given it a lot of